Page 71 of Love You Madly

I find a parking spot not too far from the park, and before I can even shut off the engine, Barrett’s already trying to unbuckle himself, gripping Mr. Chompers tightly in one hand.

“Easy there, buddy,” I say, laughing as I lean over to help him out of his seat. “Let’s grab your stuff, and then we’ll head over.”

We walk into the park, and it isn’t long before I spot Vince. I take a few minutes to catch up with him before Barrett and I continue on our way to find a spot to sit. Vince is with his fiancée, Zoe, and their daughter, Ainsley. While part of me would like to sit with them—given how close Vince and I were growing up—I just don’t have it in me tonight. Zoe’s an energy vampire, and after about two minutes of her complaining about Vince choosing the fireworks over picking up some extraholiday pay at the prison, I’m reminded of exactly why we don’t hang out more often.

I use snow cones as a convenient excuse to bail, but before I leave, Vince mentions that he and Malcolm are organizing a cousin’s weekend in a few weeks. Sabrina will have Barrett on vacation that week, so it’ll be nice to have some adult time with family. I just hope Zoe’s attitude during cousin’s weekend is better than the way she’s acting today.

The first firework bursts overhead, painting the sky in a cascade of bright purples and greens. Barrett’s his face lights up and he lets out delighted giggles with every explosion, making my stress melt away. This is what it’s all about—just being here, in this moment, with my son.

A part of me keeps circling back to Vince. I can’t shake the worry that he’s stuck in something that’s only going to drag him down further. I’ve been there before, and I know how it ends—how it eats away at you until there’s nothing left but resentment and regret.

As the fireworks finale comes to a close, a series of loud, dazzling explosions light up the entire sky. Barrett is clapping and cheering, completely absorbed in the spectacle. I pull Barrett close, savoring the simple joy of his happiness, but I know that our night isn’t over just yet. I still need to drop him off at Sabrina’s before I can head home.

When the last firework fades and the crowd begins to disperse, I start gathering up our things. Barrett’s eyelids are already drooping as I pick up Mr. Chompers and his blanket, his energy finally winding down after the excitement of the evening.

“Come on, buddy,” I say softly, helping him up. “Time to get you to Mom’s.”

Barrett nods sleepily, rubbing his eyes as he clutches Mr. Chompers to his chest. I carry him back to the car, his littlehead resting on my shoulder. He’s half-asleep by the time I buckle him into his seat, his fingers still curled around his dinosaur.

The drive to Sabrina’s is quiet, the only sound being the soft hum of the engine and Barrett’s gentle snores from the backseat. My mind drifts, wondering what Callie’s doing right now. I know it should be Karissa that I’m thinking about. But instead, Callie has been on my mind. I miss talking to her. I’m sure she’d enjoy a night like this, relaxed under the stars, with Sara probably asleep next to her.

We arrive at Sabrina’s house, and I park in the driveway, careful not to wake Barrett as I unbuckle him and gently lift him out of the car. Sabrina’s porch light is on, and I can see her silhouette in the doorway as she waits for us.

“Hey,” she says softly as I approach, her eyes flicking to Barrett, who’s still fast asleep in my arms.

“Hey,” I reply, my voice low. “He had a big night. He’s out like a light.”

Sabrina smiles, reaching out to brush a strand of hair from Barrett’s forehead. “He always has the best time with you.”

“Yeah, we had fun,” I say, feeling a pang of something I can’t quite identify—maybe it’s just the bittersweet reality of co-parenting, of knowing these moments are fleeting.

I carry Barrett to his room, tucking him into bed. He stirs a little but doesn’t wake, his tiny hand still gripping Mr. Chompers. I pull the blanket over him, making sure he’s comfortable before stepping back.

“Thanks for bringing him in for me,” Sabrina says, her voice full of warmth.

“Of course,” I reply, glancing at her. There’s a familiarity between us, a shared understanding that comes from years of navigating this complicated relationship. We’ve had our upsand downs, but when it comes to Barrett, we’re always on the same page.

“If you want to stick around for a bit, you can,” she offers, her tone casual but her eyes searching mine.

I consider it for a moment, but the weight of the evening’s events is pressing down on me, and I know I need some time to decompress. “Thanks, but I should probably head home. It’s been a long day.”

She nods, not pressing the issue. “Alright. Drive safe, okay?”

“Always,” I say with a small smile, giving Barrett one last look before heading back to the door. As I step outside into the cool night air, my thoughts go to Callie again. I wonder if she’s had as full of a day as I have. Maybe she’s putting Sara to bed or enjoying a quiet evening. Either way, I wish I could talk to her.

twenty-nine

ALMOST LOVER - A FINE FRENZY

CALLIE - JULY 4, 2013

Iswear, it’s like the universe is punishing me for something I haven’t even done yet—or maybe something I did years ago and forgot about. Either way, it’s like I’m destined to take the hit. No reprieve, no mercy.

I thought, after everything that’s happened recently, that I could at least take Sara to the fireworks and enjoy a normal evening. But of course, life had other plans. Wrong move, Callie.

Hawkridge was never going to be easy. I knew that. Coming back here, where every corner holds memories I’d rather forget, was bound to bring some tension. But I wasn’t prepared for this—seeing ghosts from my past in broad daylight, before I’ve even had time to sit down on the blanket I spread out for Sara.

It’s been years since I left this place behind, thinking I’d never look back. I spent so much time convincing myself I’d changed, that I’d grown beyond the mistakes I made as areckless teenager. But karma? She’s got a long memory, and it seems like everyone in Hawkridge does too.

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