Page 21 of Down My Chimney

“You say that now…”

“I say that because—” he broke off and closed his eyes for a second. “Henry, watching you tonight at the diner was amazing. You were glowing. You love this sort of thing. Art. Making it, talking about it. You should get to do that all the time, and you shouldn’t hold yourself back because you’re worried about someone else. You should do whatyouwant.”

“What ifyou’rewhat I want?” I asked, my lip quirking into a smile.

“Then I’d say we’re pretty lucky, because you’re what I want too.” Blake put his hands on my knees. “But just, for the sake of argument, if I weren’t in the picture, are you really telling me you wouldn’t be interested in this program at all?”

My lips twisted. “I might be interested. But are you really telling me that you want me to go? That you’re not bothered by the fact that we wouldn’t see each other for that long?”

Something dark flashed through his eyes, but it was gone so quickly I thought I might have imagined it. The next thing I knew, he was smiling.

“I’m not saying it would be easy. I’m not saying I wouldn’t be filled with sadness and longing and weep every day because you were gone. But yes, I am telling you that I’d want you to go.”

“Okay, now you’re just teasing me.”

“I’m absolutely not teasing.” Blake’s voice took on serious, portentous tones. “I would be rending my garments and gnashing my teeth. I probably wouldn’t be able to go to class all semester. The thought of you gallivanting around Europe, fulfilling your dreams? I’d be inconsolable. But I’d still want you to go.”

I laughed. “Well, you’d just have to make sure youfulfilledme well and good before I left. With something other than sadness and longing.”

“Speaking of that,” he said, “I, uh, finally remembered to get tested.”

My eyebrows shot up. “Really?”

“Really.”

“So if I actuallydidwant you to fill me up…”

“We have the all-clear.” His grin got even bigger, and he tugged the pillow away from me, throwing it across the room as he leaned in.

“Nowthatis something I definitely want.”

I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down on top of me. Our underwear didn’t last long, and I relished the feel of his body on mine. He was just heavy enough to be comforting. Blake was always so gentle with me, so attentive, but I loved knowing how rough hecouldbe if he wanted to.

He stroked our cocks together, and I moaned, hooking one leg around him. I wanted him as close as possible. Wanted my body to merge into his.

I’d spent so much of my life alone, but Blake was like some kind of beautiful, bizarre time machine. Every minute he spent with me, touching me, knowing me, wanting me, didn’t just make me feel good now. It went back in time and healed some earlier part of me. Every kiss made me a little more whole.

And when his fingers slid back to my entrance, all I could do was whisperyes. Blake knew me so well, and I never felt ashamed around him, never felt like I had to hide. No part of me was off-limits. Around Blake, I could open up.

“Lube?” he whispered.

I nodded frantically, twisting and reaching underneath the bed for my shaving kit. I’d stashed my lube in there, along with some condoms. I couldn’t help grinning, leaving those in the bag.

I handed Blake the lube, then pushed my legs apart, giving him more room. He slipped a finger inside me, and I sighed. It was so good, but I wanted more. He always wanted to go so slowly, but I could never get enough of him.

“Fuck me,” I moaned as his fingers worked in and out of me. “Please, I need to feel you.”

He arched an eyebrow wickedly and tossed me the lube. “Get me ready.”

It should have been awkward, the Twister-like movements of me reaching for his cock while he continued to finger me, but instead it was hot. I slicked up his shaft, and each time my hand curved over the tip, he whimpered.

Someday, I wanted to get him off, just like this. We’d never gotten to have a secret-handjob-behind-the-bleachers stage in high school, but I’d be more than happy to make up for that now. I tugged on his shaft, bringing his whole body closer as I lined him up.

“Fuck me,” I whispered a second time.

Blake slid his fingers out, and before I could even adjust to their absence, pressed the head of his cock inside. I groaned. It was everything I’d been waiting for—the sweet heat of his skin inside me, absolutely nothing between us. He sank all the way in until his balls pressed against my ass. He looked down at me, a sheen of sweat across his face.

“Okay?”

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