Page 17 of Undeniable You

“Then you’ll be a mermaid.”

We dragged our waterlogged bodies out of the ocean and had lunch together before Juniper wanted to race along the sand. I followed behind her and watched as she ran in and out of the waves and chased the seagulls.

She stopped near two kids building a sandcastle and I watched as she just started talking to them and making friends. Sometimes I worried about her not having enough friends her age now that we’d moved and she wasn’t in school, but my daughter made friends everywhere she went.

I stopped too and chatted with the two little boys before Juniper decided that we had to make a sandcastle ourselves and had to go back and do that right away.

Desperate for a few moments to sit still, I told Juniper she should make the castle herself and I’d watch. She seemed fine with that and set to work while I sat on our beach blanket and pulled a sandy paperback out of my bag that I’d started reading during our last beach trip. I’d marked my place, but I’dcompletely forgotten everything about the story, so I just started over again.

Every page or so I flicked my eyes up to Juniper, who was well-versed in sandcastle construction, so she already had a good foundation going.

If I let myself, I could have fallen asleep right there. Juniper had mostly given up on naps, but every now and then she would crash at the beach and I’d take my opportunity to rest with her.

As much as I tried to keep my focus on the book and my daughter, I couldn’t help but wonder what Jo was doing today. Sophie and Reid had gone on a hike, so maybe she was with them? They invited me and Juniper sometimes, but it was hard with Juniper being so young. She wasn’t up to longer hikes and it was hard when she hit her limit and we had to turn around and go back. Sometimes we all had to carry her back, which she enjoyed, but wasn’t ideal.

If she wasn’t with Reid and Sophie, what would she be doing? Perhaps she’d gone to the farmers’ market, or the strange used bookstore in the city, or stayed home and cleaned her apartment.

It was getting late once Juniper had finished her sandcastle masterpiece and I took plenty of shots of it on my phone, along with video, and told Juniper it was time to get going. I shook out as much sand as I could while Juniper tossed everything in the wagon, and we dragged it back along the sand to the car.

Juniper was contemplative on the way back and didn’t give me too much fuss as I grabbed what we needed at the grocery store. It was a relief she didn’t fight me in the cereal aisle. She was drowsy as I did my best to carry everything upstairs in one trip. I’d gotten almost everything and was annoyed that I’d have to make another trip.

I’d also have to clean up all the sand we tracked everywhere, but that was the price you paid for going to the beach. Sometimes you brought a little bit of it back with you.

The rest of the night was quiet after I got Juniper in the bath, threw a frozen pasta and chicken dinner in a pan, made a side salad and garlic bread, and then settled Juniper into bed early because she couldn’t keep her eyes open anymore.

Six years ago, my Saturday nights looked very different, I mused to myself as I brushed my hair out after my shower. It wasn’t even nine yet and I was already thinking wistfully of my bed.

If I’d still lived with my parents, they would have watched Juniper so I could go out, but it was always disappointing.

Either I’d see someone and share an attraction and get too in my head about the consequences of a hookup, or someone would act like they wanted more than just a hookup and I knew that the little girl sleeping at home was probably a dealbreaker. There weren’t a ton of people my age or even a few years older that wanted to sign up for a single mom.

Most of the time I just told them I wasn’t looking or wasn’t interested to stave off the inevitable rejection.

Sophie always told me I was sabotaging myself, but I couldn’t help it. If the choice was between dating and my daughter, I was choosing the latter.

Someday, when Juniper was older, I’d try again.

Chapter Seven

Jo

Weekends that weren’t full of schoolwork were my new favorite thing. Couldn’t get enough of them. I probably should spend all my time doing fun activities, but what I really wanted was to read and take walks in the city and browse the shops without any intention of buying anything. Reid and Sophie had invited me to go hiking, but hiking with just the two of them usually involved me looking the other way as they took every opportunity to kiss and touch. Most of the time it was fine, but it was more in my face when we were on the trail together.

Instead I did all the other shit I wanted to indulge in that I held myself back from during the week. Summer was the perfect time to get a late lunch on the water by myself, ordering a gorgeous and delicious drink and a fresh lobster roll and enjoy the live music of a random guy strumming on a guitar.

When I walked home after my lovely lunch, I took a detour to walk by Larison’s bookstore. The windows were still covered in paper, but the sign was up on the front of the faded brick facade.

BETWEEN THE SHEETS with a little logo of a person sitting up and reading in what looked like an open book. Cute and clever. The font reminded me of those vintage romance covers.

On one side of the bookstore was a jewelry shop and the other had a toy store that had dozens of plush animals arranged in the window.

It was a great location, as if I knew about that kind of thing. I couldn’t wait to come when it opened up soon. No doubt a bunch of the money she paid me to watch Juniper was going to get funneled right back through to her pocket when I couldn’t stop buying books. I’d have to set a limit for myself or something.

When I’d started working for Larison, I’d requested to follow her social media accounts and she’d accepted me, so now I could see what she and Juniper were doing today. There were a few pictures and videos from today of them at the beach together and I did my best not to stare too much or zoom in on the way Larison looked in her swimsuit. It was one of those one-pieces that looked vintage, with the little strip of fabric on the front that made the bottom part almost look like a skirt. It was black with white polka dots and with her hair blazing red in the sun she looked like a pinup dreamgirl.

Shit. Looking at pictures of Larison in a swimsuit wasn’t what I needed to be doing. Instead, I set my phone aside and decided to spend the rest of my time reading. Much better use of my weekend than lusting after Larison.

Monday rolled around,as it was wont to do, and I arrived at Larison’s apartment for the day. She opened the door looking harried and I could tell things weren’t going well.