“Let’s go sit outside for a minute.”
“It’s cold as fuck outside.”
She smiled. “Don’t be a wuss. Grab a coat, and let’s go.”
He did as asked. They went outside and sat down on the bench on the porch. It was cold, but the sky was clear. Harlem could see her breath as she spoke. “How are you? Really?”
Carter exhaled. “I don’t know. A lot is going on.”
She nodded. “I certainly understand that. My dad is a good guy. He’s just protective.”
“You don’t need to apologize for your father being a father. I appreciate his straightforwardness.”
“Thanks for being understanding.” They continued to look up into an inky night sky that was void of stars. A few moments later, as they sat quietly, she spoke into the darkness. “This too shall pass. I keep telling myself that.” She turned to him. “I know that you’re grieving, but you have to believe it too. None of this is easy. And just so we are clear, I know that you have my back, but I meant what I said. I also have yours. You’re not alone.”
Her words meant a lot. “Thank you.”
She reached for his hand. “We’re bonded for life, right?”
Carter took her hand and held it. “It looks like it.”
Chapter 24
Harlem lay in her bed, staring up at the ceiling. The sun was just starting to break through for the day, but she’d been wide awake for a couple of hours.
Harlem whispered. “Happy Birthday.”
Getting through the funeral was tough, but today was going to be equally long and emotional. Harlem was still in shock on the day of the funeral. On that day, her only goal was to get through it. She didn’t really say a proper goodbye. If she were honest, Harlem had only recently begun to process Damian’s death. Due to her pregnancy, she didn’t have the luxury to wallow in her own pain and guilt. She needed to forgive herself, forgive him, and then let Damian go so that she could move forward. She mumbled. “No point in trying to go back to sleep.”
Harlem got out of bed and put on her robe and slippers. She walked softly into the kitchen, trying not to wake up the house. It was still only around 5:30 in the morning. Harlem put on a pot of decaf coffee. She turned around only to find Carter standing in the kitchen doorway with his coat on. His voice was low, so he didn’t wake up her parents. “I thought I heard someone in here.”
“Oh. It’s only me. I was making a pot of coffee.”
“I was just about to find the nearest McDonald’s or something to grab a cup.”
“You don’t have to go out to get coffee, Carter. All you had to do was ask.”
“It’s kinda early. I didn’t want to bother anyone.”
“Couldn’t sleep?” She could see the dark circles underneath his eyes.
“Not really. I nodded on and off. You?”
“Falling asleep is never a problem. Staying asleep presents all kinds of challenges.”
Carter walked into the kitchen. “You had coffee before bed. Is coffee good for the baby?”
“Please don’t turn into my dad,” Harlem said. “It’s decaf. And just so you know, I’d kill for some regular dark roasted brew, so be careful.” Harlem grabbed a coffee mug out of the cabinet and set it down in front of Carter. “Do you like sugar and cream?” Harlem realized she didn’t know. She’d made his coffee like her own last night.
“No. Black is fine.”
Harlem let the coffee finish brewing, then poured them both a cup. She sat down opposite him at the kitchen table.
Neither of them spoke for a bit. Both were lost in their own thoughts. “Carter?”
The coffee was awful, but he drank it as if it were the best he’d ever had. “Yeah?”
She ran her finger around the rim of her cup. Her words were slow. “When we get to the cemetery, can you give me a few minutes alone?”