Page 146 of As the World Falls

Blood splatters on my face and chest as he falls down my body to the ground. My chest rises and falls with sharp breaths as I fight to calm down now that he’s dead, and I know Cecilia is okay for the most part.

I look up, meeting Tobias’s stern gaze, his expression pained like he knows this will all crush her. I look down at her now, seeing her eyes, wider than ever, on Lance’s limp body at my feet.

She was still. So very still. Seeing her creates a burning in my throat because what I had just done could never be taken back. She had to see it in front of her, the man she loved killing the man, her friend she’d loved almost her whole life. I didn’t know if we’d ever recover from this.

“Lance,” she whispers. “Lance,” she repeats louder, waiting for him to answer. Her hands curl into her hair again, pulling on the strands as she fights to keep her composure. “This isn’t real,” she cries. “This isn’t…this isn’t real.” Tobias kneels beside her, pulling her to him as she starts to sob. Loud, drawn-out cries ripped from her like she was being physically tortured. It was the worst sound I’d ever heard in my life. “I want to go home,” she screams through her tears. “I want to go home. I want to go home.”

“Okay,” Tobias says quietly. “I’ve got you. I’ll take you home.”

My heart feels like it’s violently ripped from my chest. It’s like she doesn’t see me anymore. I was nothing to her. All she could see was her friend dead on the ground. All she could feel now was everything she had gone through the last couple of months since knowing me coming to a head. The worst part wasI wouldn’t change what I did. I would kill him a million times over again and put her through this pain if it meant she was safe from him.

I walk to the fountain, sitting on the ledge as Tobias tries to calm Cecilia down. Her cries eventually die out and turn into soft, quick breaths. He helps her stand on her feet, and she does so shakily. Once she’s on her feet, she takes a deep breath, turning her back to me.

Tobias’s gaze bounces around them and then lands on me. “I uh…I’m not sure how to get back out of here.”

I stand now, carefully walking toward them, keeping my voice low. “I’ll show you out.” Tobias nods, waiting for me to go ahead of him, and I do, only glancing at Cecilia once, who doesn’t look back before leading them out of the maze.

It’s only about ten minutes before we return to the patio. I stop once we’re there, letting them go ahead of me now.

“Shit,” Tobias mutters, looking into the doors dividing the patio and living room where Marco lies. He runs inside, I’m assuming, to check if he is still alive and call the medics.

Cecilia stands on the patio, her eyes staring at the ground like she is catatonic. Yet, after everything, when I knew I should leave her be, let her heal without me, and find a better, safer life…I couldn’t let go of her.

“Don’t go,” I murmur. She still doesn’t move, but I see her eyes break from their trance as she looks at the ground in my direction. She doesn’t say anything, though, so I continue. “Don’t go,” I say again. “Let me take care of you. I can’t fix what I’ve just done, but let me try to fix what it’s done to you. Lean on me. Trust me to take care of you. Please. Don’t leave me.”

She finally turns her head to look at me, her eyes softer now, and I can’t help but hold my breath, waiting for what she’ll do. She looked a mess. Her hair was tangled, her silk night dress was covered in dirt, her hands and cheeks were covered in driedblood and dirt from touching her face and hair, and somehow, she still looked angelic. One that had been through a war. She’d never not be beautiful to the point that it was almost painful for me.

She walks toward me, and I can’t keep still. I stride toward her, letting her crash into my arms. She buries her face into me as I wrap my arms around her, my insides feeling like they finally stand still after an ongoing earthquake. I shut my eyes, resting my chin on top of her head. I was so fucking tired. I just wanted to carry her up to bed, draw the curtains closed, and keep us there for the rest of the year.

She wiggles in my arms and pulls away slightly, looking up at me. “I’m not okay,” she says softly, her eyes misting over again. “None of this is okay.”

“I know. You’ll never know how sorry I am.”

She nods, her hand finding my cheek and caressing it. It’s like her touch melts my insides. I didn’t understand how she could stand before me so broken and still have it in her to be gentle with me. I’m ready to pick her up into my arms, but the sound of movement behind me catches my attention instead, and before I can turn, all I can see is Cecilia’s eyes widen, and she’s gripping my shirt with both of her hands and pulling me to her as she turns us.

The world spins painfully slow as she trades places with me, and my eyes catch on Chuck, who is coming full speed at us from the side garden. ?He lunges hard and connects with Cecilia’s back, causing her chest to collide with mine. I know something is wrong when her stare instantly glazes over, and she becomes heavy in my arms.

Chuck takes a step back, and his delirious laugh fills the air as his proud gaze watches Cecilia fall to the ground. I go with her, fighting to keep her in my arms, but she’s dead weight.

“I told you what would happen if you crossed me,” Chuck snarls violently. “This is your fucking fault.” I ignore him as I sink to the ground, gently holding Cecilia in my lap as my heart beats furiously in my chest, a fear I’ve never felt before painfully slamming through my body.

“Cecilia. Cecilia,” I rush out, shaking her chin in my hand as she fights to keep awake. “Baby. Baby, what’s wrong? Stay awake. God, please stay awake.” It’s then I see the blood spreading through her dress under the left side of her ribs. I lift her slightly, finding the handle of a knife sticking out of her back. Her blood stains my hands, and I turn her back in my lap, seeing her eyes slowly blinking as she watches me. “No. No. No. Fuck. You stay awake. You hear me? This is not happening. Don’t you fucking dare.” My voice is rough, and I think I might actually be crying. I don’t think I’ve ever done that before. I scoop her into my arms, and her hand flies out, weakly gripping my arm.

“James,” she says faintly.

Chuck’s monstrous laugh becomes louder, and for once, I can’t think about killing him. I can only just hold her. It was all I cared to do.

“You ruined me,” he rages like he was trying to justify his actions for being exposed.

I hear the patio doors slam open, and I know it’s Tobias. A small bit of relief fills me when I hear his steps barrel toward us, and I see Chuck’s face drop as he starts to scurry backward.

“What the fuck?” Tobias shouts, running toward us all, taking everything in. He pauses for a moment, finding his sister's limp body in my arms, and his gaze turns dark. Murderous. He looks back up to Chuck, who is stumbling out of the garden to escape, but Tobias catches him and, in a silent rage unlike I’ve ever seen, grabs him by the head and completely snaps his neck in a split second. All I hear is the drop of his bodyhitting the ground, and only a moment later, I hear the sirens of the medics pulling up to the house.

I look back down at Cecilia in my arms. “The medics are here, baby. They’re going to fix you. Okay?”

She swallows thickly, her hand squeezing my arms tighter. “It doesn’t hurt,” she murmurs. “I don’t think that’s right.”

The tears in my eyes burn as I fight to blink them away. I didn’t want to miss a single second of looking at her. “Why did you do that?” I kiss her forehead, keeping her tight in my arms, rocking her as I wait for the medics to get to us. “God, I can’t lose you. Why did you do that?”

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