Page 59 of Love Me Dangerous

“Jess, no,” I reply, my voice firm.

“Promise me you’ll at least ask him.”

I remind myself what the school psychiatrist said in our one family meeting about kids like Jesse. When they get fixated on something, it’s like stopping a stampede of wild mustangs. “I cannot make a promise like that.”

“Why not?”

The psychiatrist also talked about the importance of boundaries. Back then, I didn’t know what that word meant. But I’ve since learned, and even though I suck at enforcing them with my brother, this one comes easy. “Because it’s inappropriate.”

After a dramatic eye roll, he says, “Did you tell Dad?”

He means L.A. “Not yet.”

He gives me an impatient groan.

“Can you help with Linnie on Friday or not?”

“Of course I will.”

“Dad won’t be home until ten or later. I’ll make dinner for you.”

“Mom sent my ticket.” His face goes still.

“Oh.” The emotions rising into my throat turn the word into a squeak.

“I leave on the fifteenth.”

“You’re going to miss Thanksgiving?” I shouldn’t be so upset. Thanksgiving isn’t like it used to be when Linnie was small and we all lived at home. The past few years, I’ve had to beg Jesse to come, and Linnie hasn’t eaten turkey since Mom left. Maybe that’s underneath all of this. My family is changing, but I’m the only one who hasn’t noticed, and soon they won’t need me at all. My gut coils with a cold, hard dread.

“Mom said?—”

I put up my hand to stop him because I’m not interested. “I need to leave on Friday at six-thirty.”

Jesse’s shoulders tense. “Okay.”

Outside the shop, I force several breaths of the crisp, dry air into my lungs. Jesse leaving isn’t permanent. He wouldn’t do that to us.

But will our family be the same?

“How’s Zach doing?”Ava asks when we’re cleaning up at the end of our shift.

I spray down the snack table and wipe it with paper towels. “I don’t know.”

“You could call the Huttons and ask them.”

“What if they tell me he’s gone?” Every day I don’t see him, this feels more real.

Ava’s kind eyes tense. “He doesn’t seem like the kind of guy who goes back on his word.”

Everyone goes back on their word eventually. “I want to invite him to Autumn Fest.”

“Maybe skip it and spend the day taking care of him instead.” Ava carries the Lego bin to the shelf.

I spray the changing table and wipe it down. “That’s probably not a good idea.”

“Why?” Ava turns to me, a curious look on her face.

“Because he kissed me and I turned to jelly. I had like zero self-control.”