Page 93 of Always on My Mind

“EnglishandProtestant.”

“Oof,” Dominic winced. “Double whammy.”

“I know. Usually I have better taste.”

He chuckled. “You must have loved her a lot.”

Tessa swallowed through the sudden tightness in her throat. If only he could understand the true depths of the love that existed between her and Jamie. It was impossible for most. Even if she could explain it, she didn’t want to. If she started, she was sure she would burst into tears right there in the middle of the pub. And while that wouldn’t be the most embarrassing thing she’d ever done, she wasn’t eager to let it happen. And yet, her bottom lip trembled.

“Aye,” she said quietly. “So I did.”

Hearing herself put it in the past tense made her gulp down the rest of her second beer. Clearly, being sober was not going to get Jamie out of her mind.

“If I get super drunk, would you be able to see me home?” she asked him.

The corner of his mouth ticked up into a sad smile. “Is that what you want?”

“It really is.”

“Alright. I’m here for you.”

“God bless you, Dominic Keegan.”

The lights reflecting on the wet street blurred in Tessa’s vision as she stumbled, catching herself on Dominic’s arm. He kept her upright with a giggle. She took a big step leaning against him.

“D’you believe in soulmates, Dom?” she asked, slurring her words.

“I suppose,” he replied. “Do you?”

“Oh, aye. I don’t have a choice but to believe in them. The girl I just broke up with was mine. Which is why I think I’ll need to be steaming like this for the rest of my life if I’m going to live it in peace.”

“You’re drunk right now, and still thinking about her,” he pointed out. “I’m not sure that’s the solution.”

“Ach, that’s a good point, so it is. But I still think it makes it easier. I don’t want to cry right now, and that’s better than usual.”

“If she’s your soulmate and you’re this cut up about losing her, why did you break up?”

“Because she’s not out, and it’s a massive secret,” she said through a sigh. “If I was with her right now instead of you, I wouldn’t even be able to do this.” She shook his arm to clarify. “And we aren’t even having sex or anything.”

“Aye, so we aren’t,” he chuckled.

“See, it’s stuff that wasn’t even inherently romantic, but she was so scared of being out, she pulled away every time. And maybe I’m sensitive, but it hurt me.”

“Ach, no, I don’t think so. It’d be hard for anyone to be with someone they felt as if they were hiding from the world. I know I wouldn’t put up with that either.”

“And we’ve tried dating before. Had the same problem. But I gave in to her wanting to try again because of the stupid soulmate thing. And it is stupid. Fucking soulmates. Bunch of gobshite, so it is.”

“Soulmate or not, everyone deserves to be loved without shame.”

Tessa blinked and nodded. “Absolutely.”

“I’m sorry you’re hurting, though.”

She hummed and rested her head on his shoulder. “Thanks.”

They continued in silence until they reached the Gallagher’s front door. Dominic went to ring the bell.

“Stall the ball, you!” Tessa gasped, swatting his hand down with a slap.

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