Page 1 of Always on My Mind

Prologue

“What brings you in today, Tessa?”

Tessa eyed the woman with a quirked brow. This room wasn’t right—there were no bohemian tapestries, no crystal balls, no lingering smell of incense. The house smelled of lemon furniture polish. This woman didn’t look the part either. Tessa braced herself for a turban, perhaps, and rings on every finger with bangles that jingled around her wrists. But no, this woman, Lila, donned a crisp white button down and mum jeans with penny loafers. Her brown hair, streaked with some gray, hung in a plait over her shoulder with a ribbon tying it off. Her only eccentricity was a pair of large glasses with a whimsical floral pattern on the frames. All of it was friendly enough.

“You don’tlooklike a psychic,” Tessa said.

“That’s because I’m not a psychic.” Lila’s mouth turned up into an amused smile. “I’m a past life regressionist.”

“And the difference is?”

“The difference is in where we look. Psychics, in whichever practice, be it tarot or palm or what have you, most of them arelooking into your future. Usually to help you with a decision, or give you comfort about what’s coming. I’m here to help you uncover your past. Which unfortunately, you can do nothing about. Though it can help you understand yourself.”

Tessa let that percolate, still unsure if she was doing the right thing. But after seeing not one, but two friends find their soulmates from a past life, she had questions of her own.

“How does it work?” she asked.

“Have a seat, and I’ll explain everything,” Lila replied, gesturing to the plush gray couch against the back wall of her pristine sitting room.

Tessa hardly realized she was still standing. She took a hesitant step, wondering if she should drop this whole thing. She had Jamie in mind when she booked this appointment and. . . it hadn’t worked out for them. For good reasons. Did it really matter if she found out they’d known each other in a past life? What difference would it make? Inexplicably, she took a seat on the couch.

She glanced around at the family photos placed sparsely throughout the surfaces of the room—a couple on the wall, one on the mantel, two on the end table. Otherwise the room was all whites and beiges.

“I never thought a psychic would be such a minimalist.”

“Again, not a psychic,” Lila said, and sat in a brown leather chair that was catty-cornered to the sofa. She crossed her legs and folded her hands into her lap. “Now, why don’t you tell me what brings you here today?”

“Well. . . my friends have recently had some. . . past life experiences,” Tessa began, being intentionally vague, but Lila only nodded. “And it’s made me curious about my own.”

“I see,” Lila said. “Did they see someone about their experiences?”

“No, they just sort of. . . revealed themselves to them. Through objects and shit. I mean—stuff. Sorry.”

Lila shot her another amused grin. “No need to apologize. It’s best if you are your most authentic self in this space.”

“Oh, thank fuck,” Tessa sighed, and let her shoulders drop.

“That’s more like it. Now, my next question. Have you ever had a past life experience before?”

Tessa pondered that. She remembered Billie telling her about dreams and visions she had when she met Ethan, her now-husband. And as mad as Tessa found it at the time, she could relate. She just hadn’t known anything like that since Jamie.

She cleared her throat. “I think so? Not knowing if they were real made me squash down anything.” She paused for a beat. “Plus, I’m Catholic. If my ma knew I was eventhinkingabout seeing a psychic, she’d fucking wipe me out.”

“Still not a psychic, but I think I get the general idea,” Lila said. “You’d had suspicions, but ignored them because of your upbringing. You weren’t compelled to explore in earnest until you saw what happened with your friends. Is that correct?”

Tessa swallowed. “Aye, I’d say that’s the truth of it.”

“Excellent, let’s begin.”

She had Tessa lie down on the couch and close her eyes.

“Now, Tessa, I want you to take several deep breaths,” Lila instructed in a dreamy voice. The kind used by yoga instructors and dishonest gynecologists. “In through your nose, out through your mouth. And with each exhale, let your muscles relax. Let your body sink into the cushions, whilst your mind sinks into the farthest reaches of your soul. Forget any troubles you have in this life and allow your past to come forward. Whatever you see, let it form. Recognize the things around you. . . ”

Tessa let her body go leaden as the brightness of Lila’s lamps disappeared behind her eyelids. Her vision grew darker anddarker. Lila’s voice faded in her ears. Replaced by the sound of. . . waves?

She opened her eyes and glanced around. It was still dark except for the moonlight above and the lanterns hanging here and there. The salty smell of the sea wafted up from below her, and Tessa gazed out at the immense, inky black of the ocean. She took a step, and realized she stood on the wooden deck of a ship, which rocked beneath her feet. She was also in a dress unlike anything she’d ever worn before, most notably the long skirt and corset.

“Verity!”