Page 30 of All Your Hate

She’s intoxicated me, got me addicted for another taste of her venom.

6

WYNTER

Ihad to do it for her. For Summer. That’s the only reason why I let him touch me at all.

If he finds out my name then he can easily track her down and hurt her to get me to comply with even worse things.

The men in the last place did that a lot. They said they knew everything about me and told me if I wasn’tgoodthen they’d hurt the people I loved.

I was never sure if they were bluffing or if they really were sick enough to hurt a child.

The more I think about it the angrier it makes me feel. I have no idea if she’s alive at this point. Taking a breath, I calm myself down. If I want to find her I need to get my anger under control.

I’m left alone, unsure what I’m supposed to do here. Before it was spelled out what was expected of me. He didn’t get what he wanted in the end though.

Negative. The test was negative.

Bones wasn’t lying.

I was captured and sold as an incubator to some old fucked up man, with an ego too big to think he might have been the reason why I never got pregnant.

His voice replays in my head from when he picked me out. Asking one of the men keeping me captive if I was fertile, as I and a bunch of other girls were lined up against the wall in a tiny room. They had already started frequently drugging me then. Probably to stop me from remembering anything. Seems like it worked for the most part.

Leaning against the bathroom counter, I can feel my reflection staring back at me. I refuse to look at the girl watching me. She’s not me. I’m not some emaciated corpse of a person. I’m not covered head to toe in bruises.

I’m still me,sheis a stranger.

Turning away from the mirror I look over at the shower. Bones left me alone so long last night that I felt safe enough to get clean. I still feel dirty though.

Not that it makes much difference anyway. I’m in his house, at his mercy. Whatever he wants, he’ll take it, sooner or later. He’s made that perfectly clear.

I check the bedroom’s clear before turning the shower on.

Cranking the temperature up, I hold my arm out underneath the stream until it scalds me enough to turn my skin pink.

I toss my shirt onto the floor next to the hamper as a littlefuck youto Bones.

What sort of name is that anyway? He thinks he has the right to know mine whenthatis what I’m expected to call him. I suppose it’s better than the alternatives he could choose likesirormaster.My skin crawls at the thought.

After my shower, I feel a little lighter. Like some of the hurt has washed off my skin along with the dirt.

I’m not sure how long this feeling will last, but at least it’s helping me not want to curl up and die.

Every day I think of new ways to end it all. Now that I’m not locked up a lot of those options are closer than I’d like. They’re tempting, but the only thing stopping me from following through with my thoughts is Summer.

She still needs me. I have to survive this place.

Bones’ words still linger in the air. His promise to kill for me. Killing a person for someone else must bethebiggest thing you could do for them. If he did that for me, what would he expect in return?

When I go back into the bedroom in just a towel the coast is still clear. I’m not sure why he left here without fucking me, I saw how hard he was throughout that entire doctor’s examination. He’s a man. That’s what they do best. Take and take until there’s nothing left of you.

I’m not about to jinx it by trying to figure out why. He’s just insane.

I head into the closet to find something to wear. That’s another thing that surprises me. He's not mad about me wearing his clothes. My restrictions here are far less than they were before. But just because I’m not chained up or locked in a tiny cage doesn’t mean I’m no longer a prisoner.

It means that I have to be more careful. Especially of whatever web he’s spinning to trap me in. He’s arrogant and acts so carefree, I imagine that lets him get away with a lot of things, but I can tell how calculating he is underneath it all.