Page 66 of Our Final Encore

“I was thinking maybe we could go shopping, get some things for the baby,” I say as I hand the phone back. “We could drive down to the mall in Fort Worth.”

She stares at me blankly. “We have nine months, we don’t need to do that right now.”

She’s so hard to read now. Every time I think she might be warming up to me, her walls go right back up. I hate it. I miss when we were so close that we could practically finish each other’s sentences.

“Might as well start sooner than later, right?” I shrug. “Better to be prepared.”

She grins and looks away, refusing to meet my gaze. “What do you know about preparing for a baby?”

“Nothing, I’m about to learn everything there is to know about it though.”

A little bit of the ice in her eyes seems to thaw, and she drops her arms to her sides before stuffing her hands in her pockets. “Okay…sure. When do you want to go?”

“Next weekend?” I offer. That’s when I’ll have my first check, and along with the money left over from my last couple of shows I should have plenty to buy some necessary items.

“Okay,” she nods. “I guess I’ll see you then.” She turns away and starts to open the door.

“Wait,” I lightly touch her arm to stop her, and I don’t miss the way she flinches.

“What?”

“Um, how are you feeling?” I don’t know why I keep thinking our conversations will last longer than they do. I miss talking to her, so much. Part of me wonders if we’ll ever again be able to share the deep conversations that used to flow between us so easily.

She shrugs. “Fine, I guess. I get sick a lot, I sleep a lot. And no offense, but right now you’re cutting into my very valuable sleeping time.”

“I guess that’s an improvement, you used to never sleep,” I grin.

Her eyes flash with amusement and her lips tilt up slightly. “It sucks in a different way.”

I want to stay, I want to hold her, or at least sit next to her and learn about everything I’ve missed in the past five years. But I know that isn’t what she wants.

“Well, let me know if you need anything.” It feels empty, because it is. I have nothing of value to offer her, but I’m trying like hell to change that.

She nods and shuts the screen door behind her, giving me a slight wave before retreating deeper into her house until she disappears.

FORTY-THREE

Opal

It takes a while to find a parking spot at Target, finally I spot one in the middle of the lot. Pregnancy has definitely made me lazier, the short walk to the store’s entrance is practically exhausting, that fact is made visible by the way I’m huffing and puffing by the time I walk inside. I’m thankful for the rush of cool air that hits my face.

Alex tried to get me to ride with him, but I refused. An hour alone in the car with him would be torture. I’d have to deal with all of my conflicting emotions, and that’s hard enough to do when we’renotalone together.

I spot Alex in the dollar section in the front of the store, along with a tall brunette giggling and standing dangerously close to him. My gaze slides down her slim body, and a familiar sick feeling settles in my gut.

People talk about how bad it hurts to be cheated on, but nothing can quite prepare you for the trauma that particular type of betrayal wracks on your mind. I don’t know if there will ever come a day where I don’t compare myself toher. Even if heclaims he didn’t cheat on me, I’ll always consider it a betrayal nonetheless.

I was fully convinced that Alex only had eyes for me, and in a matter of seconds, all of the trust that took years for him to build up came crumbling down. Since then, I’ve had to pick up the pieces on my own and build my self-esteem back to where it is now.

Now, I know my worth, and I’ll never let him or anyone else make me doubt it again. But just seeing him laugh flirtatiously with some other woman is enough to pick at the wound.

It’s stupid, he isn’t mine anyway, and I’m the one thatchosenot to be with him. But my pregnant brain seems to be even less logical than my regular brain.

I turn on my heel, walking back through the automatic door that I just came in, leaving the crisp A/C as I swiftly march through the parking lot toward my car.

“Opal!” The sound of his voice instantaneously speeds up my pulse, but I keep walking, my head facing forward. “Wait,” he places his hand on my shoulder. “Where are you going?”

I twist my head slightly to look at him, but yank my shoulder out of his grasp. “Home.”

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