Page 67 of Our Final Encore

His brows twist in confusion. “You just got here. What do you mean?”

“Go shopping with your friend instead.” I’m being a bitch, but I can’t find it in me to care. I’m hangry and my pregnancy hormones are out in full force today.

“What? What friend?” he shakes his head.

“That girl you were talking to, it looked like you knew her.” My cheeks flush, and I blink away the nonsensical tears that are threatening to fall.What is wrong with me?

This isn’t who I am, but it’s who he’s turned me into. And I hate that. It’s why the possibility of us working out is zero. We’re fire and water.

He twists his head around to glance at the store’s entrance, and then back at me. “No… She told me her boyfriend was a fan and she recognized me because they went to a show together. She was asking if I had any plans to tour again soon.”

And now I feel like the craziest of crazy-ex-girlfriends.

“Oh,” I huff and slump into myself. Alex isn’t such a huge celebrity that he has paparazzi following him around or anything like that, but he does have avid listeners that closely follow his music. I shouldn’t feel jealous about that, but somehow Istilldo.

He gives me a slight smile and offers his hand. “Do you still want to shop?”

I blink a few times, the feeling of inadequacy still gripping my heart even though I know it shouldn’t be. “I’m kind of hungry,” I mumble.

“Let’s go eat then, we can shop after.” He weaves his fingers through mine before I can protest, and leads me to the other side of the parking lot. “I’ll drive.”

He opens the door for me and I reluctantly crawl up into the passenger’s side of his van.

“Where would you like to eat?”

I sit there silently for a moment, my lips pressed together into a straight line.

“Opal?”

I glance over at him, but still can’t find any words.

He sighs. “I’m sorry if I made you angry.”

“You didn’t,” I shake my head. “I just feel…crazy. I don’t feel like myself.”

He shuts the door and rounds the front of the van before climbing into the driver’s seat. “Did it make you upset that I was talking to that woman?”

Shrugging, I nod my head reluctantly.

“Why?”

“I don’t know,” I whisper.

He’s quiet for a second, studying my face like he’s unsure if he should say anything else.

“I never told you this, but I saw you with Ian one day, on main street,” he sighs. “It fucked me up for days afterward. Seeing him touch you the way I used to, it hurt. A lot.” I had no idea he ever saw us together, the only time I saw Ian since this whole situation started was when I broke up with him. “I know the feelings between us are complicated. I’m not trying to make it worse, I promise.”

They’re complicated alright. “It’s fine, Alex. You didn’t do anything wrong, let’s just drop it.”

“I just want you to trust me,” he whispers.

“Well, I don’t. I don’t trust you.” My voice is clipped, but the pain in it is evident.

His eyes flash with hurt for a split second, but he quickly blinks it away. “What can I do to change that?”

“Nothing. It doesn’t matter, let’s just go eat.” I’m definitely not in the right state of mind to try and deal with the unresolved trauma of our past relationship, and plus it’s not like it matters. We’re co-parenting, we’re not a couple.

He stares at me for a few more seconds and then sighs before turning the key in the ignition, his van rumbling to life. I briefly wonder how many more miles he can put on this thing, it seems like it’s seen better days. “Tacos?”

---