Page 287 of Accidentally Under Your Tree

I jerked my head toward my laptop. "I was just about to watch the New Girl episode where they yell at the rich neighborhood and Nick misses his flight."

"Turn on the lights!" she quoted.

"Yes, exactly!"

She scooted back on the bed in a similar position I'd just been in, leaving room for me to sit next to her. "Can we watch the one with all the Christmas parties after?"

"The one where Winstonmightstill believe in Santa?"

"Yes!"

We were halfway through the first episode—the plate of cookies devoured—when Dad and Will's voice carried from the kitchen to my room. I couldn't make out what they were talking about, but just the sound of Will's voice was enough to make my chest ache and my blood to heat.

"You, okay?" Rose asked.

I nodded, even though I didn't feel okay.

She paused the show. "You wanna tell me your side?"

I made a disgusted sound. Setting my laptop on the mattress by our feet, I shifted to face her. "So, Will and I had discussed dating privately when you two are done with…you know."

She rolled her eyes and nodded.

"I thought I could get past, like, how public your lives are. Or I just kinda assumed I wouldn't be interesting. But that photo of us shopping..."

"Gotcha. I can see how that violates your privacy. You don't even have an Insta, do you? I can never find you when I look."

"You look for me?"

"Of course. I mean, Mom and Dad give me updates, but they only know what parents know. They don't know you like Shay does. They don't know you the way Iwantto know you. So, I look for you sometimes just to get a different glimpse of your life."

A sad smile tilted my lips. "I had to force myself to stop checking your profiles. It wasn't easy."

"I get it."

"Anyway, that photo freaked me out. You know what I'm like. I hate attention, especially from strangers. I was all wrapped up in weird anxiety and then I told him I wasn't even willing to try a relationship. Which sucks even more because he's here for the next week and a half."

"He looked for flights, but the storm."

I flinched. A dull ache started at the base of my skull. "He's leaving?"

"He was thinking about it. Would you be disappointed if he did?"

“Probably."

She looked at me out of the corner of her eye, one eyebrow raised.

"Yeah," I admitted, "I would."

"Do you wanna talk to him?"

"I don't know if I should." If only the answer could be the simpleyes,I wanted it to be, but it wasn't. "I was so uncomfortable, and I just wanted to hide."

She chewed on her lower lip. "It just sucks, because it doesn't happen often. But one time was enough for you, I get that. It just amps up when things happen. We announced our relationship, so there are more eyes on us. When we breakup, it's going to happen. If you two announce you're dating—"

"If you get the show," I interjected.

"Ifwe get the show," she conceded. "That's a bigif. You're still my sister. It might happen when you're with me."

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