Page 38 of Say It Slowly

I suck in a breath when she quotes the graffiti that was found on the Humanities building.Fucking cunt.Was she behind that? Is she working with Tyler? Something snaps in me—anger at her, at Tyler, at this whole fucking situation.

I stand abruptly. “Get. The. Fuck.Out,” I scream, throwing my bowl of Ramen. Water, and scalding noodles go flying across the room, the bowl exploding into a million pieces as it makes contact with the wall.

The girl reels back, along with everyone else. Quickly, she scrambles to her feet, then just stands there, like she doesn’t know what to do. She’s waiting for one of the Sacred Sons to stand up for her, I’m guessing. And I’m fuckingreadyfor it. I triple dareanyoneto fuck with me right now.

When no one speaks up, she stammers, “Y-you can’t kick me out. This isn’t even your house.”

I shrug, lifting my hands. “Okay, let’s ask Roman. Maybe I should call him, eh? Then you can explain tohimwhy you’ve insulted me, threatened me, and yet still have theaudacityto be standing in front of me right now.”

I see her visibly swallow at my threat. I’m sure she doesn’t want to upset Roman. No one does. The only reason she felt brave enough to say what she said is because he isn’t here. But I can fix thatrealquick.

“Yo, Nicole, you’d better go,” Lucas says to the girl. “I’ll text you later.”

Tears well up in Nicole’s eyes, and she opens her mouth to say something, but without Lucas’ support, I guess she doesn’t feel brave enough. She clamps her mouth shut, and silently gathers up her purse and jacket, then leaves.

A couple of other girls follow her out, their gazes locked on me as they gather their things, too, and shut the door behind them. I expected them to look pissed, but they didn't. They looked afraid.

As soon as they’re gone, guilt swamps me. I don’t ever yell like that. Ever. But I’m sofucking sickof people sneering at me, insulting me,threateningme. I’ve been pushed to the absolute edge.

With a heavy breath, I plop back down on the couch. Everyone is still looking at me, but Lucas is staring at me like I’ve lost my damn mind. I reach over and take the blunt from his fingers, then suck in a long pull, and another, before handing it back.

It takes a few seconds for everyone to go back to whatever they were doing before, but not without some serious side-eye being thrown in my direction. What happened with Nicole is going to get around, but I don’t even care at this point. I’m so over the cruel, jealous energy that’s constantly being lobbed at me. It’s bullshit.

I glance down at my Ramen, which is now all over the floor. I’m still hungry. I hadn’t even taken one bite before hurling my noodles across the room.

Not my best moment, admittedly. I don’t even recognize myself. But there’s only so much a person can take before they lose it.

Pushing out a breath, I get up and leave the living room, heading back to the kitchen to find myself another packet of Ramen. Maybe this time I’ll eat it up in the bedroom. In my current mood, I probably shouldn’t be around people.

I’m leaning against the counter, looking down at my phone, when I see someone walk in from the corner of my eye. I glance up to see Lucas.

Oh, God. Here we go. He’s going to defend Nicole, and put me in my place. I can just feel it. But if he hasn’t been warned by my little outburst in the living room, then he’s an idiot, and he deserves the tongue lashing he’s about to get.

Hands in his pockets, he glances down for a second, before looking up at me. He looks exactly like his twin, and if it weren’t for his wavy hair, I wouldn’t be able to tell them apart. He removes one hand from his pocket, and rakes it through his blond hair.

“You good?” he asks.

I shrug one shoulder. “Whatever.”

“So, um, I just wanted to say…I’m sorry for what Nicole said. She was out of line, and I don’t blame you for kicking her out.”

Hm, well, I wasn’t asking for his permission, or approval, but I can accept an olive branch when it’s extended.

I release the breath I’d been holding, and shove my phone into my pocket. “Thanks, I guess.”

“I know you, uh, don’t exactlywantto be here,” he says.

The water starts boiling, and I turn my back to Lucas so I can put the brick of noodles into the water. “You’re right, I don’t.Your friend targeted me the second he saw me at the Preference Ceremony, and now—” I face him again, arms crossed over my chest “—I’m stuck in his web. And the harder I try to free myself, the more stuck I get.”

He nods like he understands, but I know he doesn’t. How could he? He’s a Sacred Son. The entire school trips over themselves to do his bidding.

So, yeah, there’s no possible way he could relate to how vulnerable I am here. I have no money, and without Bree, I have no friends. If Roman wanted to end my entire academic career, he could do it withonephone call. I know he could.

Lucas leans against the wall, hands in his pockets. “Listen, I know Roman is a lot to deal with, but he’s not a bad guy.”

I snicker at that. Not intentionally, but his comment is so absurd, it just kind of escapes from my lips.

“He’s been through a lot in the past year, and I don’t think he’s really dealt with any of it,” he says.