Page 31 of Tide Over

Logic is there, but still no.

I chuckle again and head upstairs, into the bathroom off my bedroom.

So what are you doing tonight if not dominating?

As I start brushing my teeth, I set my phone on the counter, screen still open to his texts as he types back.

I’m in my room, in bed. I had to get up last night for an emergency fix on a drilling pipe, so only slept a few hours.

My heart skips at the thought of him lying in bed, texting me.What the fuck. I close my eyes and sigh, disappointed in myself for entertaining those thoughts. Again. Because this isn’t the first time.

That sucks. So you’re just always on call?

Yeah, I’m the only welder on the rig. Some have two, but this one doesn’t.

A typical 9-5 sounds pretty damn good right about now.

I strip down to my boxers and leave the door to my room open for Miss Bobber. She’s still playing downstairs, and once she’s finished she usually sneaks in and curls up with me for the night. I climb into bed and lie back against the pillows, tapping out my reply to Liam.

I hear ya. 4:00AM six days a week is brutal. Probably wouldn’t have been my first pick if I had the choice.

But as I hit send, I wince. Fuck, I shouldn’t have said that.

It wasn’t your choice?

With a sigh, I rub my hand over my face. I’ve never said this out loud to anyone before, and I’m not sure why I’m telling him this now. But being behind a screen makes it a bit easier to say, and for some reason, I find that I want to share it with him.

No. My grandfather put so much into building this business, and then my dad did too. It’s impossible to get into lobster fishing now with the price of the licence and the equipment. Everything I inherited is now worth $1.8 million, so it would be a dick move of me to sell it off after they built it all up. It was always expected I would take over, so… I did.

But it’s not what you want to do?

I think on this for a moment, unsure how to respond. If I didn’t want to fish, I know my grandfather would understand, and my dad would have too. But I also know they worked their asses off so I could easily walk into this business and be set for life. Not many people my age can even get a lobster fishing licence, let alone own both a lobster and tuna licence with all the equipment. But it’s hard fucking work, and I didn’t think I’d be taking it over in my twenties.

But the usual guilt rises with these thoughts, as it always does. I’m lucky to own a thriving business in a lucrative trade, and I’m even luckier to never have to worry about money, so I shouldn’t be thinking this way. And I do enjoy the work. But… sometimes I can’t help but wonder what my life might look like, and who I could be, if I did something else. If I got out of Torrin Cove and experienced something different… if I might know and understand myself better than I do now.

I do like it, and I can’t see myself doing anything else now. I guess I just wonder sometimes what I would have done if I didn’t have it all laid out for me.

Any idea what that would be?

Million-dollar question.

I smile as I realize how comfortable I am sharing all of this with him… even if I don’t have the answers to his questions.

Full-time carpenter.

Ha. You already are. On top of full-time fishing.

Should have seen that coming.

True.

So, what about you then? You could do the 9-5 thing with welding.

Liam doesn’t text back right away, and I start to worry that I shouldn’t have asked that. Eventually the typing bubbles appear… then disappear. My brow furrows as I watch this happen a few more times. I’m about to tell him he doesn’t have to answer when his message comes through.

I could. I’ve worked away in oil since day one though so… this is also all I know.

Just as I’m about to start typing out a response, he starts again. So I wait.

---