Page 101 of Dirty Secrets

“Don’t do this,” Logan said quietly as Rory appeared in the doorway with Diesel and one of her other men, Caden.

“I mean it. Get out of my house and stay the hell away from me,” I said as my voice broke, and despite knowing it was the right thing to do, watching all three of my best friends walk out of that room had me breaking down all over again.

“Get over there,” Maddox muttered on his way out, and Beckett scoffed.

“She knows I’m not into cryers. You’re fine, right, Raven? You just need a minute.”

“For God’s sake. You’re too much like Skeet,” Rory muttered as she walked over and sat on the edge of my bed to put an arm around me. The unexpected comfort from her was the cherry on the top of my emotional breakdown ice cream, and I let her rock me as I closed my eyes and pretended that she was my mom just for a while until I had no more tears left.

Logan

“I can’t fucking leave her here alone. She needs me,” I argued as Maddox practically dragged me through the hospital. Reid wasn’t fighting him, walking silently alongside Maddox’s other side as he stared at the ground ahead.

“If you think you have a choice, you’re an idiot,” Maddox grunted, his grip on my arm tightening. “What the hell is wrong with you guys? You couldn’t play nice in there then beat each other up outside later like normal people?”

“He started swinging at me! I wasn’t going to?—”

“Shut up, Logan,” Reid said flatly, finally lifting his eyes to mine as Maddox walked us out the front entrance and out into the parking lot.

“Why should I shut up? You just started throwing hands at me in Raven’s fucking hospital room and got us kicked out,” I spat, motioning to Zavier, who limped around me to keep walking ahead. “Tell him, Lopez. This is his fault.”

“It’s your fault too,” Zavier said without turning around, his voice flat. “You just spoke about her like she was some whore you picked up. That’s why she kicked you out too.”

He was lucky I didn't punch him.

“Excuse me?”

He stopped walking and turned to face me, his eyes narrowed. “You heard me. The girl you love is hurting right now. Instead of comforting her and grieving the loss of your baby together, you decided it was better to try and squash Reid’s feelings and make a point that you won her like it was some kind of competition. You weren’t in there when the doctor told her she’d been pregnant, Logan. I’ve never seen something crush her so badly before, and all she needed was you.”

“Do they know how far along she was?” Reid asked, speaking to Zavier.

“Five weeks.”

My chest ached, and I rubbed the palm of my hand over it to try and ease it.

Reid closed his eyes, seeming to take a few breaths before opening them and speaking again. “They’re sure she miscarried?”

“She had vaginal bleeding when they brought her in, which made them run some blood tests to check her hormone levels. She lost the baby, Reid. The doctor wouldn’t have said so unless they were sure,” Zavier said quietly, his shoulders drooping. “It’s my fault, and I don’t understand how. The guys were sent after me by a man I don’t even know. I’d tell you if I’d gotten involved with anything, I swear.”

“Sorry that I don’t particularly believe you right now,” Reid grunted, sliding his gaze to mine. “You have to be the biggest piece of shit on the planet. Why the fuck would you risk having unprotected sex when she’s not even on birth control? How long did it take for you to convince her to sleep with you, huh? I bet you’ve been sweet talking your way into her pants for ages, and I was too dumb to notice.”

I shook Maddox off and sat on the bench close by, putting my face in my hands. “It’s complicated.”

“Hardly.”

“She approached me to take her virginity. You kept rejecting her, and when she went to ask Zavier to do it, he hurt her feelings or something,” I answered, making Zavier frown.

“She didn’t ask me to sleep with her. If she straight out asked me to be her first, there was no way I would’ve turned her down.”

Reid glared at him, but I shrugged. “I don’t know, man. She just said you’d both made it clear that you weren’t interested, and since I was her best friend, she figured she could trust me with it. Definitely hurt my feelings a little when she admitted Zavier was her first choice, but whatever.”

“When did you start dating then?” Reid growled, trying to contain his frustration so he could get answers.

“I took her virginity the day after she got drunk and tried to convince you to fuck her. It’s why she wanted to tag walls alone that morning, and why I panicked a little when she left. She was freaking out about the thought of me jumping straight into bed with someone else. I thought I’d hurt her or something, since she hadn’t told me she was going anywhere,” I sighed, looking over at him. “I fucked her against the bathroom wall after her first time, and I was inside her before remembering a condom. We both figured we could just?—”

“I don’t want to know what she thought. She doesn’t know any better, but you do,” he bit out, and Maddox let out an annoyed huff.

“It’s obvious you guys are just going to keep fighting, so I’m heading back inside. Leave Raven alone, or Beckett will have your balls. Do yourselves a favor and clear your shit out of the house and find somewhere else to stay for a while.”

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