Page 40 of Silent Cravings

This was pointless. I couldn’t tell what bothered me more. Not knowing what I did to make her go cold or knowing she wouldn’t tell me no matter how I tried to get it out of her. “All right. I see your point. I’m going to crash here until morning if that’s cool.”

Why? I could’ve left and probably should have. Something wouldn’t let me leave her now when she was like this. Instinctively, I felt she needed me, no matter how she pretended otherwise.

“Fine with me.” If only she didn’t sound so disinterested. What the fuck did I say this time? It was enough to make me wonder if I wanted to stay.

There was no falling asleep right away. I was too busy staring at her back once she rolled away from me, curling in a ball. Protecting herself. From what? Was this all about what happened way back when? If I didn’t know for sure wewould end up fighting all night with a full day ahead of us tomorrow, I would have asked. I really would have.

There would be time for that after.

We would clear the air once and for all.

The room had been quiet for a long time before the slightest whisper broke the silence. If I’d been asleep, I would’ve missed it. “I still go there sometimes,” she whispered, pulling the duvet up over her shoulder. Whether she thought I was asleep or not, I didn’t know. I could only wonder why she wouldn’t admit that earlier.

Why did she feel like she had to hide?

15

VALENTINA

“Are you sure it’s all right for me to go out today?” I turned to Bianca, chewing my lip, torn between a sense of duty to her and wanting to participate in the day for Rose’s sake. I had already missed most of her shower and had walked out early on her engagement party. I sort of owed her one event where she would get my attention.

That didn’t make it any easier to leave Bianca holding the bag the day before the wedding. It was one thing to have my nails done and a facial yesterday, but the day before the wedding would inevitably bring last-minute issues and small fires that would need to be put out.

She stuck her tablet stylus through her high ponytail before taking me by the shoulders and turning me in place until I faced the front courtyard of the hotel, where a pair of stretch limousines waited to take Rose’s wedding party—all of our moms and a few of her other friends—out to the lake that sat nestled between Evan’s country club and golf course. I was the lone straggler, practically shifting myweight from one foot to the other, torn over doing the right thing.

“You look absolutely adorable,” Bianca pointed out, eyeing my navy-and-white striped top and white pants. I had gone all in on the nautical theme. “You are not going to waste looking this cute on a day spent following florists around a ballroom. I’ve got this. Go enjoy yourself before I have to tie you up and shove you in the damn limousine.”

“Ouch. Fine,” I grumbled, slinging a straw bag over my shoulder and taking a deep breath. I had to learn when to step back. While I’d never considered myself a control freak, this wedding was starting to make me reconsider.

“Go,” Bianca ordered behind me when I didn’t leave fast enough for her. “I’m going to start thinking you don’t trust me.”

Nothing could’ve been further from the truth, and that was what got my feet moving. Aria poked her head out through the open window of the second limo when she caught my approach. “Finally! Let’s go!”

“Are you always this impatient?” I asked my twin, who’d had her formally amethyst locks tinged a darker shade of blue yesterday. They shone in the sun before she ducked back into the vehicle, where I joined her a moment later. Sienna wasted no time handing me a mimosa.

“You look like you could use a drink,” she announced, raising her glass to me. “Let’s get this party started!”

“As much as we can party with our moms around,” I pointed out, laughing warmly.

Rose snickered, holding a cup of what looked like lemonade. She’d graduated from ginger ale. “Let’s be honest. I wouldn’t be partying anyway,” she reminded us. I wondered if she was consciously aware of the way her hand drifted to her belly, which was still mostly flat.

“How are you feeling?” I asked, sipping my mimosa and settling back against the leather seat. Sienna was right. I did need this.

“Fantastic. I finally turned a corner, thank God.” She smiled brilliantly, patting her belly. “I keep telling this kid to give me another couple of days before they decide to start showing themselves, and we’ll be all set.”

She felt good. That was a good thing. My pulse doubled just the same, and a sick sensation twisted my insides. I’d felt good that awful morning, hadn’t I? For the first time in weeks. But everything wasn’t okay. It was the exact opposite when I’d started bleeding.

“Don’t worry,” Aria joked. “If you have a little bit of a tummy in any of your wedding photos, you can just say you ate too much cake.”

I tried to laugh with everyone, but it was hollow, half-hearted. I barely heard any of them, their voices blending together in a wall of noise while I consciously forced myself to breathe more slowly. Rose was healthy, the baby was fine, she had gone for a checkup earlier in the week, and the doctor confirmed everything was going according to schedule. My story was not her story. There was nothing to be afraid of.

That didn’t mean I could relax. I spent the day only half aware of everything going on around me. “Too distracted with work to have any fun,” Mom declared once we were out on the boat, and I didn’t bother correcting her. It was safer not to.

“Oh, my God. These are gorgeous.”I looked at Aria and Sienna, both of whom gazed down at the velvet boxes Rosehanded to the three of us prior to entering the clubhouse for the rehearsal dinner.

“I was hoping you would all wear them tomorrow,” she told us in a shy, sweet voice. “But it’s up to you. I’m not going to be a bridezilla about it.”

Gazing down at the diamond and sapphire earrings, which glittered stunningly with even the slightest move, I murmured, “Are you kidding? I’d be happy to wear them.” The others added their agreement, all of us giggling over how beautiful the earrings were and how generous she was.

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