Page 48 of Knot My Secret Santa

Like shit. “Alright. What can I help you with, Noelle?” Did Avery need me? “Is there a problem with one of the builds?”

“No, nothing like that. I have a question about our Secret Santa game.”

Why did this still matter? Was she already planning next year’s? “Yes.”

“Well, Eli gave you the paper he pulled, and you told me to check with Denise. But she didn’t remember you giving her anything. So I called Eli, and he said he had Avery’s name. Avery got some real expensive gifts from her Secret Santa.”

Ah, so Noelle figured it out. Smart woman. Still, it didn’t matter. Avery had ended it all. “If what you’re asking is if I gave her those gifts, then yes, I did. I thought I’d play. Though, I guess I went overboard trying to give her what she might like. I hope I didn’t step over a line.”

“No, not at all.” Noelle chuckled. “I’m actually really happy to find out it’s you. Oh God, it’s good to finally know who it was. Thank you for playing and for all the wonderful gifts you gave Avery. She was over the moon with them. You should have told me, and I could have given someone your name. But for next year, you don’t have to spend much money for the gifts. We really just give little things.”

“Alright. I’ll remember that.” I clenched my jaw and unclenched it. I had to know. “Are you going to tell Avery? Is she okay?”

“Yes, why wouldn’t she be? I mean, she absolutely loved the gifts. I don’t see why she would be upset you were her Secret Santa.” Noelle paused and then said, “Nate, did you give her some harsh criticism again? I did say to be nicer to her. Do you think that’s why she’d object to you being her Secret Santa?”

Harsh criticism. If only that was why Avery was mad at me. Fuck. At least Noelle didn’t seem to think Avery was upset over anything. “No, that’s not it at all. She’s just been very formal about our boss and employee relationship. I thought she might not like me.”

“No, no. She’s a good girl. She follows the rules, and she’s very serious about her career.” Noelle laughed. “Actually, I think she very much admires you. She recently asked me a ton of questions about you and how Donner Designs started out. I regaled her with stories from the early days. Remember when Roberto designed that disco room for that one couple? I think, the Steins? That was outrageous!”

I smiled at the memory. “Yeah, I remember. He wore bell bottoms when he visited their place during the build.” But the fact Avery had been asking about me interested me more. She loved me, but she wasn’t here. I ached on every level from her absence. “I’m glad there’s no ill will there.”

“No, never from Avery. She’s too much of a sweetheart. Though, when you come over for Christmas, you should tell her yourself that you were her Secret Santa. It will be a great surprise!” Noelle encouraged. “Youarestill coming for Christmas, right?”

Avery wouldn’t want me there. I didn’t want to make things more difficult for her. And if I had to see her but couldn’t touch her, I think I’d go mad right now. “Well… I think—”

“Don’t you dare say you can’t come.” Noelle stopped me. “We’ve got your place set at the table and your gift. Listen, Nate, I know it’s been a tough year for you. After Landon claimed his Omega, and you don’t see him much, you’ve grown more distant from everyone and become harder. I’m sorry if it sounds like I’m overstepping my bounds here, but you’re my friend as well as my boss. Sometimes it’s like walking on eggshells around you. You need to get out more. We’re here for you, all of us at Donner Designs. We’re a family.” A rush of emotion I thought I’d long forgotten surged through me. Family. “I refuse to let you be alone for Christmas. We will show up on your doorstep with food, gifts, and cheer if you don’t come over.”

“I guess that’s a threat I can’t ignore. What time should I be there and what should I bring?” I tried to say it as candidly as possible, but I wasn’t going. I couldn’t go.

“Come over about ten or so for brunch. We have a huge breakfast and then relax and play games during the day before dinner. And you don’t need to bring a thing. We’ve got all the Christmas bases covered. You may be forced to judge whose pecan pie is the best, but as long as you say it’s mine, we’re good.” She laughed again.

“Making a note then. I’ll see you Christmas morning. Take care, Noelle.”

“You too, Nate. If you get lonely any time, call me. Call anyone. You got me?”

“I do. Thanks again.”

“See you soon, Nate!”

“Bye.” I ended the call and felt sick to my stomach. If it had been anyone else, if everything with Avery hadn’t happened, I would politely decline. Yet here I was lying and feeling disgusted with myself for it. For days, Avery had been telling me she hated lying to her family and it made her feel awful. I understood that now.

I’d been a bastard about it. It had been so long since my parents died that I’d forgotten what family felt like. Landon’s family had always treated me well, but I never considered them mine. But everyone at Donner Designs, especially my senior architects who had been with me since the beginning, the thought I’d been a jerk to any of them made me want to kick my own ass. This was my company, and they weremypeople. I would do anything to protect them and make sure they were taken care of.

Like family. Not just like family, theyweremy family.

And Avery… fuck. I had tried to take her away from her family when she needed them. I wanted to believe she only needed me, but she needed them as well.

She had won over everyone’s heart at Donner Designs from the beginning. Not just because she was Noelle’s niece either. She was an absolute angel. She was already part of that family too.

Avery had my heart as well. I couldn’t let her be miserable. I had to protect her, take care of her, make sure she knew that she was the most important thing in the world to me. Even if I wasn’t the only important person to her, even if I had to share her.

Screw patience. I fucking loved Avery Bell, and I would make her mine.

CHAPTER THIRTY-ONE – Avery

It was nearly dinnertime on Christmas Eve and the doorbell rang. My twin cousins raced to the front door to fetch the pizzas we’d ordered. I excused myself from the living room saying I was going to wash up and get some paper plates and napkins.

The house buzzed with excitement. There were nearly twenty of us there at the moment, and more family would come for Christmas dinner tomorrow. This was usually my favorite time of the year, but I was absolutely miserable.

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