Page 91 of Why Not Now?

I shrug. “At first, I told myself I’d get around to it. Then I told myself when I was ready to date again, I’d get rid of it. But seriously? It’s hers. I bought it for her. I guess all this time, I held on to it for her.”

We’re all quiet for a while. I pocket the box and say, “It’s fine. I’m going to be fine.”

“Ah, I remember you,” Spencer says. “The liar Derek, who tries to make people believe he’s okay when he really isn’t.”

Vic snorts, then asks, “So what are you going to do now?”

“Fuck if I know. Give her some space? Take some space. Everything has happened so fast between us this month. It felt like we’d been starved for each other. Maybe we weren’t supposed to be together.”

“Bullshit,” Spencer says.

No one contradicts him. Not even me.

“It’s time to go,” Vic says. “We all have jobs to do.” She stands and holds out a hand. “Come on, Derek.”

I take her hand and get to my feet. Then my friends each take a turn hugging me. I blink away tears because I amnotgoing to cry. In front of people.

Lis grabs a container for the cookies and thrusts it into my hands. “Don’t forget these.”

I laugh as we leave the apartment, Cerberus clipped to his leash. Since Lis moved in with Spencer, he’d been coming to Blue Vista when they’re going to be there most of the day. He has a spot in Spencer’s office where he hangs out and we take turns walking him throughout the day. He trots along beside me as though he knows I’m still upset, looking up at me with those soulful brown eyes that seem to ask that question:What are you going to do now?

When we reach Blue Vista again, I grab my bag from my car so I can change into more professional clothes. I change in my office, taking the box out again. I haven’t opened it since I bought it, but I don’t need to in order to remember what the ring looks like.

My thumb lifts the lid, cracking it open a millimeter before I snap it shut and stuff it into my pocket. I find my friends in the staff lounge drinking coffee or tea before getting started.

“When Lis wouldn’t date Spencer,” I say, “he told us not to treat her any different. Same goes for Ava.”

Everyone nods their agreement.

“I’m going to give her until the 28th. That gives her one week. We’ll get through tonight and Christmas. Then I’ll go talk to her. We’ll figure this out.”

Spencer claps me on the back and my friends file out. I follow and return to my office. My eyes snag on the picture of Abyss that Ava made, where she’s been photoshopped to look like a queen.

“We’ll figure it out,” I say to no one. “We have to.”

Chapter 30

Ava

WithextrahoursbeforeI have to leave, I should get some work done on my portfolio. I have a bunch of pictures I’ve taken recently that need to be edited and uploaded. Instead, I sit at my computer, staring at the screen, not seeing it.

Before I leave, I go upstairs and knock on Lacey’s door. She opens it, staring at me from the space between the door and the frame.

“I’m going to work.”

She nods. “Okay.”

“I’ll be home late. Probably around ten or eleven.”

“Mm-hm.”

I sigh. “Lacey. We need to talk.”

“Why? We’ve managed this long without talking. What’s another year and a half before I leave for school?”

My mouth drops open. How have I not noticed how distant we’ve become? Because she’s right. We haven’t been talking for a long time. I’m constantly on the move, going from one job to another, trying to keep everything together, somehow missing that the one thing I failed to keep together is my relationship with my sister.

“Lacey, I’m sorry—”

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