Page 62 of Deadly Don's Savage Vows

She shakes her head as tears roll down her cheeks.

Maybe I’m pushing too hard.

My heart sinks.

I don’t know what else to do.

We head home and the car is filled with heavy tension. A sadness or regret. She is struggling - fighting with her own mind and I think the conflict of it all is making it worse. Trying to force the memories is pushing them further away.

When we get home, she goes up to her room and I go to check on our son.

My shoulders are slumped, and I’m drained. I’m lost too.

I want the woman I love to come back to me. I want to hold her and kiss her.

Later that afternoon I call the doctor to ask him for advice.

“Nico, she suffered a very traumatic injury to her head. Very few people who go through that get their memory back. Perhaps small fragments might return over time, but I think you need to accept the worst-case scenario - that the year she lost will never come back to her.”

“You think we should move on as though it never happened?” I ask in shock.

“You can keep trying. There is no harm in trying to remember. But just be prepared for the worst-case scenario.”

I sigh, weighed down knowing that Bella might never be the woman who fell in love with me again.

That night I’m lying in bed, my thoughts as busy as they always are, when I hear crying drifting down the hallway.

I get up and rush to her room, finding her curled up on her bed, hugging her legs to her chest and sobbing her heart out.

“Bella.” I say, pulling her into my arms.

“I don’t know who I am supposed to be.” She cries against my chest. “I’m trying too hard and the more I try the further away I seem to get from those memories. I’m losing the fight and I feel like I’m losing myself at the same time.”

“Bella, you are still you. You are still the beautiful, kind, gentle, loving person you have always been. You are strong.”

“I don’t feel strong. I’m broken, and fragmented.”

She looks up at me and her eyes are bright with tears.

My heart breaks every time I see her like this.

Gently I brush a stray curl of hair from her eyes.

My body has been begging to be this close to her, to hold her, to feel her in my arms. I’ve been missing this so much. I did not know how badly I needed this.

Then I lose control over myself, swallowed by the urges of how we used to be - I lean down and kiss her.

I expect her to go rigid with anger, or frustration or to push me away, but she doesn’t.

She doesn’t stop me at all.

In fact, she encourages me, brushing her hand over my face, pulling me closer and melting against me. A soft moan escapes her lips as we kiss.

I pull her harder against me.

She is perfect in my arms, her fingers exploring my body.

The passion seems to escalate with each passing moment. Bella’s mind might not remember me, but her body does. She is reacting to me the way she always has - with fierce desire.

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