Page 56 of Blind Sin

Nolan and I guide her out of the hospital and back to the boat. He starts up the engine while I get Lauren comfortable at the front of the boat.

“Lauren, I begin, taking a deep breath. “I think that after we see the doctor tomorrow, we should consider leaving the island.”

She snaps her head in my direction. “Why? Father hasn’t found us. Maybe he never will.”

I put my hand on hers, but she pulls back. “It’s not just that. The island doesn’t belong to us. We don’t want to outstay our welcome.”

"Alexander wouldn't just kick us out," she counters firmly. "This isn't a holiday. We're fleeing from danger."

“That’s another reason why we should think about leaving. Every day we stay here, we’re putting them in danger too. Father isn’t really after them. It’s us he’s after. If we leave, go out on our own, they’ll be safe.”

I can’t see tears behind the gauze, but her body is shaking as though she’s crying. My heart squeezes. She’s grown too close to Alexander and Nolan. I should have taken her off the island sooner. I have no idea where we are going to go. Maybe to my friend’s house in Sao Paulo like I originally planned. I know where Alexander’s father’s money is. I could take just enough to get us flights out of here. Even as I think it, guilt pulls at me, but it’s not like I have a choice. I don’t want to steal from Alexander, but he has his father’s credit card. He doesn’t need the cash. I know it’s a shitty thing to do, but Lauren’s life is at stake and they really will be safer, the further they are away from us. Tomorrow or the day after, I’ll run away with Lauren…

And this time when we go, no one will ever find us.

Lauren

I should be feeling elated, but a grey cloud has formed over my head. I never truly thought we’d stay here for the rest of our lives and I knew that our time here would be short-lived, but I guess I pushed the thought of leaving down deep where I wouldn’t have to think about it. I don’t want to leave. It’s ridiculous that I’d want to spend my entire life on a private island, but it’s what Lucy and I have dreamed about ever since we first started talking about running away together. I don’t know how to live. I’m not prepared for the outside world. This island, with Nolan and Alexander, made me feel safe. Even if, by some miracle, I get my sight back, our father will chase us for the rest of our lives, and if we can’t be safe in the middle of an ocean, where can we be safe? I can’t even say all this to Lucy, because honestly, what options do we really have?

Still, it feels like my life is splintering and I’m not ready for all this to end.

I put the glasses to one side and peel the gauze from one eye away. The doctor told me to leave it on, but if we really are going to be running tomorrow, I want to be ready for anything. Excitement flips in my stomach and I have to blink as the light hits my eye. It burns painfully and I have to close my eyes and breathe for a minute before I can try again. When I open it, the light isn’t so bright and it’s forming into something. I shape, I guess. The window? My heart pounds with a mix of excitement and apprehension as I reach out in front of me another darker shape moves in front of the window. My hand. I can see my hand. I wiggle my fingers and my eye tracks the movement. I reach for a dark shape on my bed, which I know are my glasses because they are the only things I’ve put there. My hand misses, but after a couple of tries, I successfully grip my fingers around them. I run them through my fingers, trying to make sense of the shape of the lenses and arms.

There’s a knock on my door. I quickly stick the gauze back on my face and slip the glasses on over the top as the door opens. I already know it’s Lucy. The others have never knocked at my door. They’ve never even been in my room for more than five minutes, despite me wanting to know what it would be like to actually sleep next to them. To fall asleep in their arms and wake up with them.

“Hey,” Lucy says as she sits down on the bed next to me. “I’m sorry if I upset you earlier. I don’t want to have to run again, but I don’t see any choice.”

“I don’t want to leave them, Lucy.”

She takes my hand and gives it three squeezes. “You’ve grown fond of them. I get it. They are growing on me too.”

Fond feels like such a bland word for how I feel about them all. What I do feel defies explanation and I think that might be because I’ve not had the experience everyone else has by my age. All I know of love is what I hear on my soaps and this isn’t like anything I’ve heard on any TV show. It’s real and ferocious and painful and beautiful.

Behind the gauze, an itch begins to build in my eye, growing more insistent by the moment. It's an irritating sensation, one that instinctively makes me want to reach up and rub it. I almost do, but decide not to. This is my secret and I’m not sure I’m ready to share it yet. Not even with Lucy. She’ll find out tomorrow when we get to the doctors… if we get back to the doctors.

“I guess I’m fond of them in the same way as you are with Josh.”

“That’s a funny thing to say, Lauren. What makes you say that?”

I can feel a knot of uncertainty forming in my stomach. “With you dating again, I just assumed you were still in love with him.”

A long silence follows, stretching out, filling the space with a growing sense of unease. Finally, Lauren breaks it, her tone a mixture of surprise and something indefinable. “I'm not dating Josh. Who told you that?”

“You did!” I shout out but then stop. I think back to the conversation we had back on the beach yesterday. She didn’t say that she was dating Josh. I assumed it. “If you aren’t dating Josh, what were you talking about yesterday on the beach?”

“Oh god,” Lauren breathes out.”Shit. I thought you knew.”

I sit patiently waiting for her to continue. “When I was working on that last movie, I began to feel er… I fell for someone. One of my costars.”

Her admission sends my mind racing through the cast list of her recent film. “Freddy Lewis? Harrison Cook? Or, uh, that funny guy? What's his name?” I rattle off names, trying to pinpoint who it could be.

“Stop naming actors!” Lauren exhales sharply, a mix of frustration and nervousness in her tone. Then, with a soft but firm voice, she says, “Scarlet.”

“Scarlet Lexington?” I can't hide my surprise. My mouth falls open. “You’re in love with a girl?”

“Is that okay?”

“Of course, it's okay, Lucy.” I reassure her quickly, even as I try to process this new information. “It's just a lot to take in. Why didn't you tell me?”

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