Page 50 of The Queen's Serpent

Can I even trust that he will get me out of this jungle? Who is to say that he won’t try to kill me as I make my escape from the compound, and then blame it on me? Should I try to reach Diego, and tell him what Santiago is trying to do?NO! Don’t be stupid and weak!My mind screams.

This is my one chance to do what is right: save Diego from himself and me. The words that Santiago spewed echo through my mind:toxic, plague, destructive, curse, I am all of those things and more. I know that I can never be the woman Diego needs at his side, and right now, I need to save myself. I need to finally be fucking strong, and protect myself without counting on someone else to do it for me. From this moment on, I will be completely alone.

“How… when?” The words become tangled on my tongue, as thoughts race through my mind.

“Your grandmother’s mercenaries are mere miles away from the compound, and will find us by nightfall. They will help create a diversion, and occupy Diego and the men. I will help you slip out of the western part of the compound and into the jungle, where a cousin of mine will lead you through the jungle, until you have reached safe passage. They will have a new identity waiting for you, Isabella.”

His hand tightens painfully on mine, crushing my bones and causing the blood to stop circulating to my fingers. “You must let Isabella Stratford die in this jungle,chica. When you step out of the jungle, you will be someone new, and that woman is no longer a Stratford, do you understand?”

Sadness threatens to overwhelm me with his words, and the meaning behind them. Isabella Stratford, the woman I have struggled to be all my life, will die here, and in her place, someone new will be reborn, perhaps even someone I can finally be proud of.

“I understand.” With my words, I seal my fate and agree to end my life as I know it forever. I just hope that I make it out of this jungle, yet at the same time, I can already feel the longing to stay with Diego. Will my heart be able to survive losing another man that I love?

It survived before, didn’t it? You are still alive and will continue to live, with or without a heart; that has always been your fate.

Chapter twenty-seven

Santiago

“It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend.”

William Blake

I pace back and forth in my quarters, running my rough and scarred hands through my thinning hair. The knowledge of what I have done, weighing me down, as if dark tar was plastered on my body. I have lied and conspired against the man I have always been loyal to, and considered a son.

Am I doing the right thing by removing this woman from his grasp? Yes, no, I no longer know what the right thing is. All I know is that I am watching him self-destruct, because of his love for her. A love that will ultimately lead to his very death. Stella Stratford will have him murdered for abducting her granddaughter, and if she doesn’t, then his own men will become traitors and turn on him.

I’ve been listening to the grumblings, and the whispers, for months since we brought Isabella to the jungle, but now dangerous words are being uttered by angry voices. The men not only fear Diego, but they believe that he’s entranced by a witch, who has stolen and corrupted his very soul. After what occurred with Paulo, the men are terrified that they might be next to die for merely looking at Isabella, and are ready to abandon him, or cut him down, to protect themselves. I can’t let that happen. I can’t let them turn on Diego.

That is why I secretly reached out to Diego’s father, Manuel. I explained to him what has been happening here, and together we came to this agreement to save Diego, not only from himself,but from destroying what is left of the Cabano empire, just to have this woman who does not deserve him.

I know I’m being harsh with my thoughts on Isabella; she is not an evil person. At least, deep inside my heart, I don’t honestly believe that. She is just not the woman who is meant for him. She is too weak, selfish, and stubborn to survive in our world. That weakness will get Diego killed, especially if she were ever to fall into the hands of the other cartels like his mother did.

The memory of Julia Cabano slides into my mind. Her smile lit up the night sky, and her dark eyes were always filled with mischief, much like her son’s were when he was a child. I miss hearing the twinkling of her laugh, that always reminded me of bells at Sunday mass back home in Columbia. The truth I will carry to my grave is that I was in love with Diego’s mother for years. She became my sole reason for staying with the Cabano family; originally, my loyalty was only to her.My Julia, mi corazón. ?

She is the one who begged me, with her sweet lips and words, to protect her son, as if he were my own. It is that promise I made with my own blood to her that has kept me at Diego’s side, as he grew from a child into a ruthless man. Despite the many obstacles and hardships that have been thrown in his way, including losing his mother so brutally, and being abducted and kept prisoner for months, at the hands of a rival cartel, he has flourished. He has become a man I am proud to follow and support, in any way I can, except in this.

This woman has been a curse from the moment he laid eyes on her back in Casbury. I urged Manuel to intervene then, but the greedy bastard that he is, he wanted a Stratford heiress. To him, it didn’t matter which sister Diego chose, as long as he ended up with one of them.

Personally, I believe he would have been better off with the other one, Mia. Yes, she is mostly insane, reckless, and morethan likely to plunge a blade into your skull, just for looking at her the wrong way, which always caused fear to rush down my spine anytime I was in her presence. She’s also the type of woman Diego needed at his side, one he could grow his empire with. A ruthless queen, fearless, loyal, and unwilling to bend or break, instead of a weak woman destined to only bring hardship in her wake.

Yet there was no convincing him once he laid eyes on Isabella Stratford. I watched as she consumed him from that first moment. She became everything to him within such a short time that I worried for his very sanity, and I was right to. Look at what has befallen us, enemies in every direction, and us hiding in this damn jungle just waiting to die.

I hear the sound of my door sliding open quietly, and soft footsteps making their way across the stone floor, and I turn around to greet my elderly mother. I can’t believe I let fucking Manuel talk me into bringing her into the jungle, to care and cook for us. I must have truly lost my mind to be willing to risk her safety.

At least, after this, I will be able to get her far away from here and the Cabano family. My shoulders sag, with the sad knowledge that I may never see my mother alive again, after what is about to transpire. I need to remove her from Diego and Manuel’s reach, and send her off to live with relatives they don’t know about. I can’t allow her to be harmed when, and if, Diego realizes what I have done to help Isabella escape.

“Hijo, estás bien? Está todo listo?”Her soft, weary voice makes my heart ache. I love my mother dearly, and I wish I didn’t have to be parted from her. She’s my only true family, but I need to save her from the boy I think of as my son.

“Sí Madre, we are ready. It will be just a few short hours before that witch’s army arrives at the compound gates, and thenI will have Salvio ready to take you in the opposite direction of Isabella.”

“Estás seguro de esto? Qué pasa si estás equivocado?“ She lays her wrinkled and age-spotted hand against my face, her small, frail body not even reaching my chin.

“She will be his death. I have no doubt about that.” Although it hurts my heart to know that what I am doing will only cause Diego pain and anger, I honestly believe in the long run, I am doing what is best for him, by removing this woman from his grasp. In due time, he will be able to heal, and find someone more worthy to rule at his side. Isabella Stratford was never meant to be his.

“La niña está embarazada, Santiago. Le quitarás el hijo a Diego. Cuando descubra lo que has hecho, no te perdonará y te matará.“ A crystal tear slides down her lined face as she reaches up and kisses my cheek, before moving away from me and leaving the room.

The silence is almost deafening in her absence. Her words dig into my heart and soul. Fuck, she’s absolutely right. If Diego ever finds out that I had a hand in taking Isabella away from him, especially with the knowledge that she’s carrying his child, he will murder me.

---