Page 50 of Cowboy's Sinful Bargain

I wasn't.

I was mesmerized.

Jos looked so fierce right now. His arm muscles bulged as he hovered over the top of me. His jaw was clenched and his eyes were flashing with rage, turning them from cornflower blue to dark shards of blue glass.

I looked Jos square in the eyes and said, "Rikon."

Jos's eyes narrowed. "I refuse."

I cocked an eyebrow. Apparently, he knew what that word meant. Some perverse part of me became curious. I wanted to see what his reaction might be to me saying divorce again.

"Rikon.Rikon. Rikon."

Jos's eyes blazed. His hand clenched around my braid, pulling my head back so my face was angled with his. His lips smashed down on mine and he thrust his tongue into my mouth.

I moaned as I lifted my legs and wrapped them around Jos's waist, our cocks aligning and rubbing against each other. Guess there was no question if I was gay or not. My dick felt like a steel pipe in my pants.

I wasn't going to let him get away this time.

Jos suddenly stopped kissing me and lifted his head to stare down at me with an intensity that made my heart stop. It felt as if he was searching for something. I wish I knew what it was. I'd help him find it.

When he climbed off of me and stood, I reached out a hand for him, desperate to have him back, but Jos just turned and hurried out of the room.

My hand fell back to the bed, tears forming in my eyes. I laid there, unable to move, unable to think, unable to breath.

He had left me.

He had kissed me and then he had left me.

Was I that undesirable?

That unwanted?

In that moment, I wanted to curl up and die. I wanted to beg my grandfather to tell me why he had let me live if this was to be my fate.

I was on the verge of rolling into a fetal position when Jos came rushing back into the room, kicking the door closed with his foot.

He wasn't wearing boots.

He crawled back onto the bed, moving over the top of me. He froze when he looked down at me and then reached up and gently wiped a tear away. "Why are you crying, Miko?"

"You left."

I hated his grin.

Jos held up the items in his hand. "We need supplies and I didn't think you'd have any in here."

Supplies?

"Can't have gay sex without them."

Like I'd know that.

"What are they?" I asked.

"Lube and condoms."

I wasn't so out of touch that I didn't know what those were. I just hadn't thought about them in terms of sex between two men.

---