Page 158 of Toxic

There was a long silence on the other end before Liam spoke again.

"Why are you calling at all? I don’t know what you want from me now, Soren. Forgiveness? What am I supposed to say? Give you my blessing to be with him when… when for me, it means a tragedy? I lost you after all these years of waiting. I had you for two months, and now you’ve taken that away from meagain—" he stopped. A moment of silence, then I heard him start to cry. My stomach twisted painfully. I was leaving a trail of hurt behind me.

"I’m so sorry, Liam. I thought it would work. I wasn’t lying about my intentions. But it’s just too strong…"

He sniffled. "Take care, Soren. I hope you’re not making a huge mistake. But don't expect me to be waiting for you when it all falls apart."

"I’m not expecting you to. You should find someone good, someone who isn’t a mess like me. You deserve better."

"You’ll always be the best to me, Soren. You’re everything."

A wave of pain hit me hard. "I have to go now. Take care," I whispered, my voice breaking as I hung up. I pressed my hands to my cheeks, feeling the tears spill over.

The balcony door creaked open, and Skye stepped outside. His face was full of sadness, but there was also a softness there I hadn’t seen since my miscarriage. He knelt by my knees.

"I hate seeing you suffer," he whispered, squeezing my hand. "I just want you to be happy. Tell me what to do, Soren. Please. I love you so much."

My voice cracked as I said, "I don’t want to suffer either, but… it’s not that simple."

His lips touched my forehead in the gentlest kiss, then trailed down to my lips. He held me, lifted me up, and carried me to the bedroom. When we made love, it was in the classic missionary position, and he looked at me the whole time, occasionally brushing my cheeks and whispering how much he believed in us, in our future, in healing.

I felt tears on my cheeks, and after a while, I couldn’t control myself anymore. I broke down crying, sobbing with pain, while he held me tightly in his arms, rocking me and promising impossible things that I so fervently wanted… for him to give me.

I so desperately wanted him to heal it all.

My imperfect body, my life—and US.

And he promised to do that.

Being in his arms, I could even believe it. For a second.

SKYE

I woke up to the soft, peachy-pink light filling the room. I looked at Soren, lying in my arms, his head resting on my shoulder, his long black hair spilling over my chest. He was here, with me. My dream was fulfilled, at least the first stage of it, the rest I had to work hard to build myself. Slowly and carefully, I got up and headed to the shower.

Afterward, I made breakfast, put it on a tray and went back to the room where Soren was still sleeping. He stirred when he heard my footsteps, his pale face turning toward me, looking apathetic.

"Breakfast for you, sleepyhead," I said, trying to put on a happy face.

I sat down next to him and placed the tray on his lap.

"Thank you," Soren mumbled quietly, looking strangely uncomfortable, oh how well I knew this expression.

He seemed calmer but still a bit sad. His thoughtful eyes drifted to the tray. He reached for the coffee cup and lifted it to his lips. I stayed silent, watching him.

Soren ate for a while, then his gaze fell on the violin case lying on top of the wardrobe.

"Will you play something for me?" he asked.

I winced slightly because I hadn't practiced much lately, I had tuned the violin about a week ago, but I was hoping it would sound decent.

"Alright, I can play, but I’m not warmed up, so I might be a bit rusty."

I took the instrument out of its case, stood by the window, and raised it to my shoulder. I started playing slowly—"A Thousand Years" by Christina Perri, violin cover—noticing with some surprise that my fingers didn’t feel as stiff as usual, despite the lack of practice.

Soren watched and listened for a while, even pausing from eating his breakfast.

When I finished, he said, "Do you like these ancient songs?"

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