Page 95 of Creatures of Chaos

His gaze shifts back to me, his brows low over his eyes. “And I can’t help that I don’t like seeing the two of you together.”

“You know what I don’t like? I don’t like how fast you dropped my hand back there at the first sight of another dragon shifter.”

Becks at least has the decency to look guilty. “That wasn’t what you think.”

I laugh and the sound is bitter, even to my own ears. “It’s exactly what I think it is. You don’t want anyone to know about us. You want to hide our relationship. You’re ashamed of me.”

Panic crosses Becks’ face. “No, Locklyn, it’s not like that at all. I don’t want to hide anything. If I could I’d march right into Nightlark Academy holding your hand, letting the whole school know who you belong to.”

We pull up in front of my parents’ store. I don’t know how I’m going to get back inside without them knowing, but right now I’m too worked up to really care. So what if my parents ground me for the rest of my life?

“Then why don’t we?” I challenge.

“It’s complicated. You know that.”

I do, but my feelings aren’t just hurt anymore, they’re wounded and bleeding out. Maybe it isn’t fair of me to ask Becks to stand by our relationship, to stand by me, but that’s what I’m doing anyway. I’m tired of feeling less-than. If Becks isn’t going to stand up for me, I have to do it for myself.

Opening the door, I glance back at him before getting out. The look on his face is torn, and my instinct is to say something to soothe him, but I’m done with all that. I’ve always been willing to fight for us, but if Becks isn’t, then there’s truly no hope for us.

“Then I’ll uncomplicate the situation for you. I’m done,” I say, and then jump out of the truck, slamming the door behind me and walking away from him, my heart shredding a little more with every step.

Thirty-Two

“You look awful,”Ensley says when she slides up next to me in the hall as I’m on my way to first period.

“Thanks,” I answer sarcastically, but she’s not wrong.

After climbing back up the drainpipe to sneak into my room, I didn’t have a chance to shower this morning and so my greasy hair is piled on top of my head in a knot. I barely paid attention when I was throwing on clothes and only realized when I got to school that the shirt I’m wearing has a stain on the front, and the jeans I chose are from last summer and too short. The redness of my eyes and the dark smudges under them complete the look.

I don’t look at her, but I can feel Ensley silently assessing me until she finally says, “Why do you look so sad? Everyone is buzzing about you making it to the finals. You now have a one in six chance of winning, but even if you don’t you’re already a legend. You should be on cloud nine.”

I steal a glance at her out of the corner of my eye and she appears genuinely confused. “Have you seen Becks this morning?”

She shakes her head. “He was already gone when I got up. I just assumed he had an early morning practice. Why, what happened?”

“He picked me up from the trial. Someone must have texted him the location, and we got in another fight.” I look over at her and lower my voice so we can’t be overheard. “I think we broke up. Or at least however you can break up before you’re ever really together.”

She gasps. “No you didn’t.”

I nod, snapping my mouth shut because tears are starting to well in my eyes.

Grabbing my arm, Ensley yanks me into an empty room and demands I tell her everything, and so I do.

“Oh, Locklyn,” she says when I stop talking. “I’m so sorry. But you have to know Becks adores you.”

I look away from her to keep tears from spilling over. “Even if he does, that may not be enough. It may not have ever been enough. There’s just so much against us.” I glance back at her, sure my heart is shining from my eyes. “I’m not sure we ever even had a chance to begin with. Maybe I just built this all up in my mind to be something it’s not.”

She’s shaking her head before I even finish talking. “No. Don’t say that. It isn’t true. What you and Becks have is real.”

“You’re just saying that because you love both of us.”

“I’m not,” she says forcefully. “Anyone who cares to look can plainly see what’s there between you two. You two just fit together.”

“I don’t know. I just don’t feel . . .”Cherished. Pursued. Wanted. I sigh. “Everything is just so messed up right now. Becks and I have been off since the news of his arranged mating came down and Chaos started. I don’t know how to get back to being us.”

She tilts her head. “But you don’t really want to go back to where you were before anyway. Right? Your relationship with Becks is evolving.”

“It feels like we spend half our time fighting. We never used to do that before.”

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