Page 45 of The Accidental Ghost

Nina clucked her tongue. “Listen, take it from someone who had the exact opposite for parents, and somebody who’s a parent now. Parenting is a hard fucking balance. So fucking hard. We all left our childhood with shit on our plate. None of us got out unscathed. Some more than others. You’re allowed to fuck up sometimes, Ralph, as long as you quit clinging to it like a life raft and forge ahead. Note it’s a trigger and work to understand it.”

Wanda nodded her agreement, plopping down and curling her legs underneath her slim skirt. “Nina speaks the truth. I catch myself all the time with my children. I never want them to hurt, but I have to remember, sometimes hurting is a lesson well-earned, and there’s no way I can protect them from everything. It’s impossible.”

Ralph gulped back her tears. “She did her best, and I loved her. I always had food to eat and a warm bed, but I didn’t do a lot of the things most kids did at my age because she was always afraid someone would snatch me up or do something heinous to me. I didn’t have sleepovers or go roller-skating because none of my friends’ parents could watch me as carefully as she could. Even as I got into my teens, Mom was super strict about dating and makeup. Her mindset always tuned to disaster.”

“Maybe something happened to her that she never fucking told you about? Because even parents have baggage, too, Glow Stick,” Nina reminded.

“That’s fair. Maybe something did, but at least if she’d given me an example, instead of simply denying me everything but spending all my time with her, I could have had a better understanding. Instead, she oppressed any and all chances for me to be inquisitive, for me to discover life.”

Wanda smoothed hair away from her face, her eyes warm with understanding. “So did you rebel?”

Ralph scoffed. “Not even a little. I was too afraid to rebel. I remained the good girl all my stinkin’ life, but I also didn’t know how to navigate new situations or make friends. I’d been on the outside looking in for so long, I was rooted in fear. It made me incapable of trusting new people. It also took me a long time to speak up for myself, because I was so used to being quieted. But I guess I spoke up tonight, didn’t I? It was rude and the wrong time for it, but I don’t want things kept from me because I need to be protected from the truth. I’m fifty years old, for pity’s sake.”

“What about once you graduated high school. You ran away as fast as you could, didn’t you?” Wanda asked.

“Oh, I tried, but Mom was paying, so I stayed mostly local, even though I had the chance to attend UCLA. I did stay in the dorms, which was a massive argument, but I guess everything happens for a reason. That’s where I met Hazel. She offered me a sampling of adventure. She encouraged me not to overthink every little thing, and we’ve been friends ever since.” Ralph looked down at Dale, sound asleep by her side, and wondered it if worked out, if she could stay here on this plane, how would she explain what happened to her?

Nina stroked Dale’s velvety ears. “And you’re pissed at Ghost Talker because he tried to protect you the same way your mother did all your life…”

Blowing out a breath, Ralph sniffled. The similarities were there, for sure. “I really was a jerk. I hardly ever swear, and I swore at him, and he’s been nothing but nice to me.”

And she felt horrible about it. He’d only tried to help, and she’d spit in his face.

“Yeah. You know something, I don’t get that shit. Swearing’s just a form of communication—it gets the fucking point across pronto. Why’s that a bad thing?”

Ralph laughed, looking into Nina’s beautiful eyes. “It’s not a bad thing, I guess, but regardless, it’s something I don’t do often. Probably because I worked with children all my adult life. But that’s neither here nor there. You communicate however you like, Vampire. I’m not judging.”

Nina wrapped her arms around her long legs, pulling them up to her chin, giving Ralph a thoughtful look. “You know, I think you’re probably one of my favorite clients—like ever. You take shit on the chin and you don’t whine about it. You jumped right the fuck in like a duck to water and started doing whatever the fuck you’re supposed to be doing here without a single protest. It’s impressive, and a nice damn change.”

Ralph smiled at Nina. That was her. Don’t make too much noise, her mother always used to say. She was aces at being noiseless.

“Did I mention it’s a nice change from the usual bullshit?”

“You did, but it isn’t because I didn’t want to speak up. It’s because I was afraid to say anything for fear you’d pop my eyeballs out and eat my innards. If my mother taught me anything, it was to measure my words. I keep my ‘scared witless of the vampire’ on the inside.”

Nina barked a laugh. “I don’t think it only means you’re cautious. I think it means you’re GD brave, Raphaela Tucci. Smart and brave and probably one of the most decent people I’ve ever met—even if you’re a little cagey from time to time.”

Ralph cocked her head. “But you’ve only known me one day. How can you be so sure?”

Her chin lifted, her eyes glittering. “I’m a pretty good judge of character. That’s fucking how. Also, I can mostly smell a shitty fucking person from a mile away. You ain’t it.”

Ralph’s heart clenched as she pressed her hands to her chest. “My cockles, they’re all warm,” she teased, instinctually reaching out to pat Nina’s knee.

“Outbursts aside, how do you feel about what Shamus told you, Ralph?” Wanda asked. “That you can stay on this plane feels like something most people would favor. But how do you feel knowing that?”

Now that they’d opened Pandora’s box, the impact of what was inside slapped her in the face. “I think it’s a can of worms. If I am a psychopomp, and I can live here on this plane like all the other living people, how will I explain that to Hazel? My shop owner neighbors? The police? Do I rise from the dead straight out of the morgue?”

Wanda blanched, biting her lip. “That is a dilemma. But first things first, are you ready to hear more about what being a psychopomp means? Are you ready to find out what we have to do in order to get you situated?”

“We?”

Nina flicked her fingers at Ralph. “You sound surprised. Don’t be fucking stupid, Glow Stick. Of course, we, dingbat. We’re in now, and I wanna know what the fuck’s going on and who the fuck took you to Hell. Because he needs an ass-whoopin’, and if ass-whoopin’s in the cards, I want a piece of that. That’s what we should be doing. If we quit now and send you packing, it’s like watching a series on Netflix only to find out those shitbirds canceled it.”

Ralph laughed. “I hate when that happens.”

Wanda sighed, long and raspy. “What Nina means is, we want to help you because we like you and we can’t think of anyone more deserving than you to offer our help. We also think the person who took you earlier might be responsible for what’s going on with your powers.” She slapped her thighs, dropping a kiss on Dale’s head before she began to rise. “That said, are you ready to get the whole picture?”

Ralph gave Dale a fruitless pat on his hindquarters, floating upward to head back downstairs and face her fate. Enough was enough. “I’m ready.”

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