Page 137 of Ten Mountain Men

I nod. “I couldn’t tell you. I didn’t want you to know. I was taking the cameras down when you walked in on me, because I’d realized how wrong it was to have put them out. That one—” I point at the one he’s holding. “That’s the last one. There were twelve in all. They came in a pack of a dozen. Six snails, six pebbles. I tried to get them all down but I couldn’t find that one.”

“Guess I’m better at finding things than you are then,” Clay says, but his words are humorless.

“I am so sorry. I—”

“You said you were in love me,” Ranger says, and there are more sharp intakes of breath all around.

“She said she lovesus,” Ash corrects, to the others. “All of us.” Then he finally looks at me. “Was that a lie too?”

“No, Ash. God, no. That was—”

“That’s neither here or there. You’re done explaining, you can go now,” Luke says. “Should we take a vote to make sure it’s unanimous?”

One by one, the brothers look at Luke, then at me. Then one by one, they look away again.

“Gotta go with Luke on this one.” Ranger splays his hands, like there’s nothing he can do, and gets up and leaves the room. Without even a goodbye.

The others follow suit.

Ash stares at the floor, his jaw clenched so tight I can see the muscles twitch in his face. He doesn’t speak up. He doesn’t fight for me. Do I deserve for him to? Probably not, but it still hurts like hell. Finally, he gets up and heads out the back door.

It’s just me and Luke and Buck.

Buck—he seems to be the holdout. His face is torn, his brow furrowed like he’s waging some internal war. He glances at me, then back at Luke.

“I’m sorry,” Buck whispers, his voice barely audible, but it slices my heart in two like a goddamned guillotine.

And that’s it

It’s over.

Luke stands up, his movements sharp and deliberate. He grabs my bag that Hunter brought back in, and without a word, he walks to the door and flings it outside again.

Finally, Luke breaks the silence. His voice is cold, final. There’s no grumpiness. There’s nothing. “Buck will take you to your campsite to get your things. He’ll make sure you get off this mountain. I put your phone in your bag. If my brothers meant anything at all to you, please delete those pictures.”

I feel like I can’t breathe. This is really happening.

Buck steps forward, guilt written all over his face. He reaches out like he’s going to touch me, to offer some kind of comfort, but then he stops himself, letting his hand fall back to his side.

I stand, my legs trembling beneath me.

“And once you’re gone,” Luke says from behind me, his voice low, “don’t come back. Ever.”

Chapter 45

Buck

Ilead Goldie to her campsite, my hands shoved deep in my pockets, head down. I can barely look at her. Every step I take feels like another nail in the coffin of whatever we were, whatever I wanted us to be.

We were something. I have to believe we were. Or I’ll never be able to open up my heart again.

Her footsteps crunch behind me, light and steady. I feel her presence and her absence already, like a weight on my chest, making every breath harder than the last. She’s leaving. This is it. And once she’s gone, it’ll be like she was never here.

Except…I’ll remember her. I’ll remember her for the rest of my damn life.

I run a hand through my hair, which is already getting messy again as if it, too, knows she’s going away and Luke’s not going to be happy unless every trace of her is gone with her. I feel like an awkward teenager instead of a grown-ass man. My mouth’s dry, and my stomach feels like I might need to go behind a bush and heave up my breakfast. But I know what I want to say. What I have to say. What I’ll regret not saying for the rest of my life if I don’t. I’ve been thinking about it the entire walk.

When we get to her tent, I turn to face her, trying to find the right words.

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