Page 28 of Merry Little Hate Notes

My head popped off the window. “For what?”

“I know you won’t believe me.” He paused. “But I’m sorry for everything.”

“For everything? What does that mean?”

He let out a heavy breath. “It means I want to talk to you. But not now.”

This weirded me out enough that for a second, I forgot we were descending an icy mountain pass. “What do you want to talk about?”

“Everything.”

“Thanks. That really clears it up.”

He let out a tired laugh. “Let’s just get through today. And maybe someday, when you no longer hate me, we’ll have that talk.”

Wait. What? “Um ... not to be nitpicky here, but what we have”—I pointed between us several times—“is mutual hate.”

“Holly,” he sighed while observing the road and driving extra cautiously. “I’ve never hated you.”

“Yes, you do,” I vehemently contradicted him.

“I think I would know if I hate you.”

For a moment, I sat stunned, trying to process this wildly confusing information. “Well, you’ve done an excellent job convincing me otherwise,” I snapped, feeling hurt, but mostly I had this odd sensation I’d missed out on something important—him. Or maybe this was just Brandon acting again. If he didn’t hate me, why would he let me believe for all these years that he did? I wanted to ask him, but I didn’t know what I could believe. Certainly not him.

Brandon blew out a huge breath. “I know, and I hate myself for it.”

If he was telling the truth, I hated him for it too.

BRANDON

I STARED AT HOLLY FROM across the restaurant table in amazement, watching her eloquently chat with Blake Vanderbilt about what Elevate had to offer Artemis in such a natural way that no outside observer would have guessed this was a business lunch. It was more like two old friends catching up while they ignored the man at the table. I figured it would go down this way. Not only was Holly upset with me, but Artemis’s culture was female focused. And it didn’t hurt that Holly had led an interesting life that almost anyone would find fascinating. Her father, Dr. Harry, as I’d always called him, ensured his children were well traveled and knowledgeable. Holly and Christian had been to dig sites in places like Greece and Peru.

When the course of the conversation shifted to the Asian influence in Artemis’s clothing design, Holly masterfully interjected her own personal touch by recounting her trip to the Great Wall of China when she was thirteen, after watching her father lecture at several universities across Asia. The pride in her voice when speaking about her father was apparent. It didn’t appear she thought any less of him despite what he had put her through. It spoke to what a good person Holly is.

“Which sections of the wall did you visit?” Blakeasked in her sultry alto voice. It matched her vibe that played between cabaret singer and Wall Street mogul. If I had to guess, she had purposely invented that persona to keep people on their toes. Mission accomplished. She was, by every beauty standard, gorgeous, with her long auburn tresses and killer body. But she didn’t hold a candle, in my opinion, to Holly. I would take genuine, quiet beauty any day of the week over the in-your-face kind Blake exuded.

“The wild sections. Simatai and Jiankou.” Holly smiled while reaching for her glass of lemon water.

“You are an adventurer.” Blake grinned while sweeping her hair off her shoulder like she practiced it in the mirror several times a day.

Holly took a sip of her water. “Used to be,” she said with a slight edge to her voice that only I picked up on.

I knew she was probably panicking inside, thinking about the prospect of driving back to Denver in the storm raging outside. I’d never seen Holly as scared as I had during our drive up here. Admittedly, it had been no joyride. The roads were slick, and it was slow going. Even I had my concerns. We’d barely made it in time for our lunch appointment at the restaurant at the resort where Blake was staying. Worse, Holly ignored me after we recorded our ridiculous song to send to Camille, all the while wringing her hands and trying to act as if she weren’t scared out of her mind.

I thought apologizing and telling her I didn’t hate her might open the door to the actual conversation I wanted to have with her, or at the very least, she would allow me to comfort her. That was a huge mistake—Holly bolted that door shut. My mother was going to be so pleased to learn I really did have no idea what I was doing when it came to Holly. It gutted me to see what life had done to her, especially knowing I played a role in it.

For her sake, I would do everything in my power to see this deal closed before the end of the year. Then she could live out her Monica Geller dream. I’d happily volunteer to move in across the hall from her, but at this rate it would be a miracle if she ever spoke to me again. The thought killed me.

Blake took a moment to study Holly before pointing at her. “I still see an adventurer in you. I have a feeling the world is waiting for youto take it by storm.”

Without a doubt, I 100 percent agreed with Blake’s assessment of Holly. If she only knew the girl I had watched take down vicious stuffed animal criminals, Blake would truly know what the world had in store for it.

Holly smiled with a devious glint in her eye, reminding me very much of the Holly I grew up with. “Well, if you sign with Elevate, I’ll be one step closer to conquering the world.”

Blake laughed. “Oh, I like you, Holly. You have spirit. Perhaps I need to steal you away from Elevate.” She looked down her nose at me, waiting for me to contradict her.

“We like competition at Elevate,” I responded nonchalantly, knowing she was a woman who liked a challenge. And she would find it offensive if a man claimed any stake on Holly, even if it was only professionally. Not that I believed any person was an object to lay hold upon, man or woman.

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