Page 101 of Risking it All

It was hard to breathe and talk at the same time. “He’s joining the gang. Not because he wants to but because he feels like he has to so he can protect his sisters. You have to help him.”

Sympathy was etched upon his face, but the way he tilted his head told me a rejection was imminent. “Macie, I have no idea how to—”

“You told me you’d always help me,” I shouted. “You told me you’d always be here for me. You said if I ever asked for help that you would. I’m asking. I’m begging. He saved me today. He hassaved me since the day I met him. He helped me find me again. I have you and Mom and everyone, and he has no one. We have to help him, Dad. We have to, and I’m asking you because you once didn’t have anyone either. So help me. Help him!”

Chapter fifty-one

Relic

Iblocked Macie’s number as well as those belonging to Lev, Demarius, and Melanie. I hated doing it. Broke my damn heart, but no one could save me now.

Not in a rush to return to the apartment, I took side streets, spent time at the creek where Marsh and I used to play as kids, and then as the sun began to set, I forced myself to head home. As I ambled near the parking lot, I saw something that shocked me, plain pissed me off, and any humanity I had left turned cold and died. Why shouldn’t my whole world be turned upside down? Had it ever been right side up?

Lyra leaned against a black Mercedes. She held hands with Eric’s top lieutenant and flirted with him. He kissed and touched her in ways that indicated he’d kissed her and touched her intimately many times before. And here I thought Lyra and I were close. Here I thought we were family who looked out for one another. Guess Lyra was a lot like Mom—she looked outmainly for herself. Guess I also found the mystery man she’d been seeing all this time.

“Know the first thing I’m going to tell Eric after I swear my allegiance to him?” I called out. “I’m going to tell him I don’t want an asshole like you feeling up my sister.”

Lyra jumped, Travis glared at me, and I didn’t care if I made him angry.

“What did you say, you little punk?” Travis rolled his shoulders back like he was willing to take a swing at me. Let him. I still felt like beating the shit out of someone.

“Nothing,” Lyra said quickly. “Relic said nothing.” She moved to stand between me and Travis. Her eyes scanned me for bullet holes and blood. “Are you okay? I was worried about you. Where’s Dad?”

I darkly chuckled. “Yeah, you looked real worried. Just yes or no, Lyra. Have you been working with Eric this entire time to get me to join his crew?”

She glanced away, and I had my answer. I motioned between her and Travis. “By my calculations, this means you’ve been in bed with Eric for what? Eight months?”

She pointed one finger into my chess and pressed. “I am not in bed with Eric.”

“But you’re in bed with his highest lieutenant, which means I’m the one you’ve been fucking over.”

She slapped me. My jaw ticked with the sting. Lyra gasped then, her hands fluttering near my face, but I took a step back from her. “I’m sorry, Relic. I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to. It’s been a rough day. I don’t know what came over me. I don’t—”

When she went to try to touch my cheek again, I snagged her wrist and placed her arm back by her side. I looked into her eyes so that she’d understand I meant every word. “Never touch me again. Never talk to me again. You want me in with Eric’s crew, guess what? You got your wish. Tomorrow morning, I’m walkingmy ass over to Eric, pledging myself to him, and then I’m going to ask for an advance on my salary. When he gives it, because we both know that he will, I’m going to come home, pack your shit up, and leave it at the dumpster, and you know Eric will give me his blessing.”

Her lower lip trembled. “You can’t do that. We’re a family.”

“We’re not a family. We’re a train wreck. If you loved me, you wouldn’t be in bed with that asshole over there, and you sure as shit would never be selling me out to Eric, but you did both of those things.”

“Because I love you,” Lyra shouted. “Because Eric is our family.”

“That’s bullshit,” I yelled back. “You want Eric because you think that life is easy, but it’s not! You’re selling my life short so that you don’t have to make the harder choices.”

“You think it was easy taking care of you and Camila after Dad went to prison?”

“No,” I countered. “I don’t. I know it was hard, but you could have chosen differently. You could have chosen a life away from Eric.”

Knowing it was a fruitless conversation, knowing we’d be screaming at each other in circles, I mumbled, “Fuck it,” then stalked away from her.

“Relic,” Lyra called out. “This isn’t over. You and I will figure this out. You’ll work for Eric, and you’ll see it’s the best decision.”

I ignored her as I climbed the steps, went into the apartment, and slammed the door shut behind me.

***

A text came in from Zuri, and after the past few days, it was a real mind screw to remember my life once had some normalcyto it, at least for a few months.I received your text regarding no longer attending group therapy. On top of reminding you that therapy is a part of your court ordered agreement, I don’t think you should stop. I’ve seen real improvements in your life. Surely, you must see them, too.

Me:I can’t come anymore. It’s what’s best for the group. I need you to believe that. I do thank you for all that you’ve done. You’re good at what you do. Keep going.

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