Page 158 of Finding Delaware

“I don’t hate you, Arya. I...” What am I supposed to say here? The truth? “I can’t say I particularly like you, but I guess I don’t really know you all that well, either.”

Which is a super messed up thing to say to someone you’ve fucked more than once.

Her lips shake with a tremble. “Because you’ve never tried. I just wanted to be part of the group.”

Gum on the bottom of a shoe. Dirt underneath fingernails. Weeks-old rancid bacon grease. That’s how I feel right now.

“You’re right. I never did, and I’m sorry.” The side of me that wants to problem solve kicks into gear, cogs turning inmy mind for ways to make this better. “Tell you what, I’ll stop ragging on you all the time if you stop calling me Tay Bae. Deal?”

I’ll also make an effort to include her more. As Christian’s girlfriend and Salem’s best gal pal, she really deserves nothing less, and I should have realized that sooner.

A bright smile forms on her lips. “Deal. Is Taytay still okay?”

“I’ll allow it.”

She giggles that high-pitched screech, and honest to God, I try not to cringe. I really do. I’ll try to work on it. Baby steps.

We sit up there a bit longer while I ask her questions, like what she’s getting her degree in (cosmetology) and her favorite food (pad thai). It’s a mediocre attempt, at best, but I’m trying. Her fingers dance above our heads the whole time like she’s playing with the stars. Since she’s tripping, she probably thinks she is. We slowly make our way down when I’ve calmed her down enough to leave our little tree spot. The hem of my pants catches again on the lowest branch, and I slip with her in my hold, causing her to knee my nuts when she lands on top of me.

“You deserved it,” she cackles while I wheeze, hopping off to run toward Christian, and I can’t disagree.

By the time we all trudge back to the campsite, Huckslee’s finally free of his dirt bed, and everyone’s starting to come down. The fire is practically out, but we pour water on it just in case. When I unzip the tent, I find Matty and Logan lying side by side in a pile of blankets, Salem on the farther side against the wall, while Xed’s phone flashes lights and colors on the ceiling.

“This shit was bunk,” Salem grumbles, glaring at us when we start to pile in. “I didn’t feel anything.”

Matty agrees. “Same.”

“Ditto.” Christian unzips his own tent and pulls Arya inside while I snicker, kicking off my shoes.

“Tell that to Huckslee. He turned into a plant.”

Logan groans, covering his face. “All I did was puke. I’m never doing this again.”

Huck laughs, falling beside his best friend while I crawl next to him. Behind me, Xed squeezes in, shutting off his phone to cover us in darkness. The rain-fly is off, stars shining through, giving just enough light for me to see Huck’s bright gaze as we face each other. Under the blanket, his fingers find mine, and I smile, closing my eyes.

After a long while, when I think everyone’s asleep, Xed’s arm snakes around me, pulling my back to his chest.

“Is this you apologizing for shoving me earlier?” I murmur, cracking open a lid to find Huck watching us curiously.

A grunt is my only response; Salem throws her leg over him, and Matt shoots into a seated position.

“Huckslee, switch me,” he says quickly. “Please.”

“No. And why?”

With a snort, I answer for him. “Matty wants to snuggle, too.”

“Please?”

Huck’s palm tightens around mine. “You are the weirdest group of friends.”

“Nothing weird about platonic cuddling.” Xed’s forehead presses into my back. “Society just says there is.”

“Please, Huck?” Matt continues to whine, and Logan sighs heavily.

“Just throw an arm over me, and let’s go to bed. My head hurts.”

Matt seems to deliberate for several seconds before he lays back down, doing as he’s told, and a grin pulls at my cheeks.

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