Page 19 of Liam

"He's special. When we're together, it feels easy."

Noah's eyebrows rose. "I've never heard you speak about someone this way. Are you sure what you're feeling for this guy is real? You haven't got your wires crossed with your cock?"

"You say that like I'm emotionally defective."

Noah smirked at me. "You kind of are."

"Fuck off. I feel different with him." We crossed the pub and stepped back behind the bar. The order chits were building up. "I want to be a better version of myself with him."

"You're already the best version in my eyes."

I shook my head. "You know what I mean. We haven't spent a lot of time together, but he makes me want to strip away my selfishness. Discard my absolute self-absorption."

Those were both realizations I'd had while thinking about Jamal the past few days.

"Jeez, I'd love to meet this miracle worker."

I concentrated on the beer tap as I filled a pint glass. "You already know him."

"What?" Noah gripped my shoulder hard. "Who?"

I set the glass on the bar mat and looked at him. Did I dare? It depended on how much I trusted Noah. And I trusted him with my life. "Promise me you won't say anything to him."

Noah held up his hand with his pinky-finger crooked. "I promise."

I ignored the childish request to hook fingers. I crossed my arms instead to contain the reality I was about to expose myself. "On Tuesday, I went to the museum with Jamal."

"That's nice, but—" He gripped my bicep. "Jamal is the guy? My Jamal?"

I nodded.

"Holy. Shit." Noah took a few paces away from me and then came back. "You've got the hots for Jamal. I never in a million years …" Noah frowned at me. "Don't you dare hurt him."

I gave Noah a gentle shove. "Fuck right off. Why do you think I'm hesitating? I don'twantto hurt him. I know my history. I know what kind of relationship I typically fall into."

"Was the museum a date?"

"No, we were just hanging out. We exchanged numbers at the wedding."

Noah worked on a few drinks. I left him to think.

"I won't say anything to him," he said.

"Thank you."

"Just promise me, you'll think this through before you do anything. The man is halfway to being in love with you already. Entirely my fault, but he really admires you."

"That's mutual." I glanced away and dried my hands, avoiding Noah's gaze.

"But you have concerns beyond whether he likes you that way."

"I feel like an asshole … but the paralysis is a big deal."

"That doesn't make you an asshole. You have valid concerns."

I clung to the bar towel. "Can he not feelanything?"

"Maybe you should askhimthat."

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