Page 68 of Finn

He looked concerned that I was mad or upset by his suggestion, but I wasn’t, not at all. I mean, it isn’t like I’ve never thought of that myself.

I told him as much and then said, “Years ago, shortly after it all happened, my parents tried to get me to go to counseling.”

Quietly, he asked, “Did you try it?”

I shook my head. “No, I refused.” And then I explained, “Much like my feelings on how I felt I didn’t deserve to ever be happy, I also believed I was no longer a good enough person to be helped. I now know that was all part of me punishing myself. So that’swhy I never went to therapy, even years later. I just didn’t believe I could ever be healed.”

Finn squeezed my hand. “But you feel differently now, right?”

“I do.” I nodded exuberantly so he’d know I truly do think I can he helped and healed, and that I deserve it. I deserve happiness. I went on, “In fact, I’ll call when we get back to Atlanta and see what I can set up.”

“I think it’s a good idea,” he said.

And, man, he looked so happy that it made me want to cry—good tears, though, not bad.

God, I love him so much.

And he’s too good to me.

But not too goodforme.

I finally believe that.

See, I am getting better. But I absolutely do plan to go to therapy once we’re home.

In the meantime, I’m having the time of my life up here. Finn keeps me so freaking busy. We do a lot of fun “Alaska” things, one of which is go on a whale watch.

Wow, was that spectacular!

We end up seeing ten different humpback whales breeching the water, one with her baby. An orca even makes an appearance. Not to mention, there are so many eagles flying around and seals out sunning on rocks.

It’s a day I’ll never forget.

We do many other fun things as well. We go to a salmon bake, take a helicopter ride over the glaciers, and, hell, we even go dog sledding.

That sure was wild.

Some of my favorite times, though, are the ones like right now, where Finn and I are just walking through the trails that wind through the forest behind his cabin.

“It’s so quiet around here,” I say as I nudge a small branch off the dirt path we’re on with the toe of my hiking boot.

The path is wide enough at this point that we can walk side by side.

Taking my hand, Finn agrees, “It really is. I think I’ll keep this property forever.”

“I hope you do,” I reply softly. “I’d love to come back up here again with you.”

He squeezes my hand. “Of course we’ll be back, Sammie. We can come here anytime you want.”

I remind him, “Not during hockey season, though. You’ll be too busy.”

“Not necessarily,” he counters. “It’s not out of the question. We do get breaks here and there.”

“That’s true,” I agree. “Like the All-Star break.”

I look over at him and wink, since that time of year this season was technically the beginning of us becoming a couple.

We just didn’t know it yet at the time…or for a while afterward.

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