Page 86 of My Heart Before You

“The wait’s only twenty minutes.” Max appeared at his side. “Hey, Ashley. Having a good day off?”

Her eyes darted from his to Max’s before a forced smile laced her lips. “Sure am, Dr. Campbell. Just grabbing some sustenance.” She lifted her bag before her surveying gaze flashed back to his face. Colin knew he looked like he’d been hit by a Mack truck, not a simple bicycle. “Well . . . I should be going.”

“See you later.” Max’s voice held a smile.

Ash’s legs pulled her away from the two of them in long quick strides, glancing over her shoulder once. His friend’s eyes flicked from the sidewalk to his face.

“Shit, Colin. What is it?”

Rubbing at the eyebrow just below his sutures, he made himself say the words. “Emilie’s in Virginia.”

“Oh,” Max said slowly.

Virginia.

Not only had he scared her away from him. He’d sent her fleeing the state.

“Maybe she had a planned visit and failed to mention it.”

Colin put his hands on his hips and stared at the grey asphalt beneath their feet, willing himself not to give into the bottoming out feeling that dropped in his stomach. All the hope he’d harbored up until that point that maybe she just needed some time and they could work through this evaporated. Max’s thick hand clasped his left shoulder.

“I’m sorry, man.”

“Yeah.” His vision memorized the color of the various small pebbles trapped beneath him, trying to ignore the fact that his chest felt like it had been cracked open by a sternal saw. “So am I.”

After parking his car, Colin took the elevator to his condo and fiddled with his keys. He knew what would be behind his door when he opened it.

Memories.

The ghost of Emilie everywhere.

Mementos of a different time when things were all possibility.

Hanging up the keyring with his wallet, he walked into the darkened main room. His piano sat silently in front of him, bathed in moonlight. He pushed a hand through his hair as he forced himself to drag in another deep, uncomfortable breath. Generally, he only played during the day, but a song pushed itself into his mind, resonating down his forearms to his fingertips.

Light danced off the white keys until they were cast in shadow as he gently compressed them. The melancholy dissonance of the mild melody against the harmony pulsed in his veins. Somber chords filled his silent condo and hovered in the air. Unlike when he tried to play earlier this week, his fingers didn’t stumble or hit incorrect keys. Tonight, the slow pulsating ebb and flow of the pianissimo tones sang out the misery that beat in his chest.

His head hung heavy after the final keys were pressed. When a drop fell against the bench between his legs, he pushed the back of his hand over his wet eyes and stood. He needed to get to bed, or at least lie in bed and maybe sleep would actually come to him tonight.

Tomorrow, he was back on the surgery schedule. Tomorrow, he could do what his body and mind were trained to do. He would help others. He would save lives. He might not be able to repair his own, but he could put back the pieces of other peoples’ damaged hearts.

?Chapter 33?

Walking on to the floor to gather her assignment, Emilie ignored the rising dread pulsing through her body. It had been a week since she’d systematically dismantled her relationship with Colin. She didn’t know if he was still recovering, but she knew eventually they would be working together again. After writing down her four room numbers, she sat at a computer to look up her patients’ names.

Her mouth gaped open at the first one.

Killian O'Connor.

Bolting from her chair, she hurried to the assigned room, barely pausing as she rushed through the door.

Bo’s wrinkled, weary face looked up and smiled, but there was no happiness in his eyes.

“Hello, Emilie.”

She gingerly sat at the side of his hospital bed and reached for him. Bo gave his life-weathered hand to her, and she relaxed a bit at its warmth.

“Hi, Bo,” she said, holding back the tears that threatened at the corners of her eyes.

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