Page 43 of Stuck in Paradise with You

I want to talk to her about what happened. I need some closure. But my legs slide further down the sides of hers and I think she nudges back into me. It’s a move that’s barely there but I don’t think I imagine it.

I’m staring at her neck, wondering what she’d do if I just brought my mouth down to touch her, to nibble the lobe of her ear, in the way that used to make her squirm.

‘What are you doing?’ she shouts, springing up to stand.

Shit. WhatwasI doing? I come to stand too and hold up my hands in submission. ‘I was just putting your lotion on. No funny business.’

‘No funny business? You were shuffling and nudging.’ She pokes the air with her fingers. ‘Right into me! And Iknowwhat you were thinking, Luke Chalmers.’

She starts prodding my chest with her finger.

‘I was thinking your pasty skin will fry in this heat, Carrie. And, oh yeah, you’re welcome.’

‘I’m welcome? For your horny little groan and roaming fingers?’

Did I groan? No,shedid. God, did I? Was it me I heard?

She’s forcing me backward, fierce in her prodding until I grab hold of her finger to stop her.

‘You know something, Carrie? You need to get over yourself.’

My words bring thunder to her eyes. I’ve never seen her, or any woman for that matter, as mad as she is in this moment.

‘Andyouneed to cool the hell off!’

I’m too busy staring at her to respond quickly when she pushes my shoulders and sends me stumbling off the trampoline, onto the sleek, white deck.

My calves hit the catamaran’s safety rail – ironic – and next thing I know, I’m flying from the vessel, crashing into the water as the boat continues to slowly sail past me.

‘What the hell did you do that for?’ I yell to Carrie after I kick and thrash my way to the surface. ‘You could have killed me pushing me off a moving boat!’

‘We’re crawling,’ she says, eyes casting up to the sky. ‘Regardless, you were making a move!’ She’s walking along the deck to keep level with me. ‘And you have a girlfriend!’

‘What do you think I am, a glutton for rejection?’ I slap the water with my palms. ‘Christ, Carrie, I wasn’t making a move, I was trying to save you from a disgustingly expensive healthcare system.’

She stops moving now that’s she’s reached the back of the boat and keeps her eyes on me. I’m getting further away fromher but I’d love to be able to read the expression on her face as she asks, ‘You really weren’t?’

‘No, for God’s sake. Now can you get them to stop the fucking boat?’

‘Oh crap, yes. Hold on.’ She seems to faff on the spot, turning right, then left, not actually doing anything productive.

‘It’s not like I’ve got anywhere to go!’ I shout, watching the boat move further and further…

Then Henry appears next to Carrie – of course he does – and calls, ‘We’re turning around. Stay calm. It’s best to float on your back. Enjoy the water.’

Enjoy the water. I’ll give him enjoy the fucking water.

Nevertheless, I roll onto my back and float while the catamaran makes sluggish work of coming about.

It gives me time to think…Was I making a move? If I had been making a move, would she have been receptive? If she didn’t think I was dating Alisha, would she have been open to it?

I’ve had a lucky break. Carrie was right; I did need to cool off.

I do not need to go there again with her, ever.

This has been a good, though death-defying and unwanted, time out.

A perspective-getting near-drowning.

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