Page 91 of Breathing Without You

“Aw babe, I’m so sorry he put me in a tough spot there and I didn’t know what to do.” Winter bites her bottom lip, you can tell she feels terrible by the look in her eyes along with the sympathetic look on her face. I hate when people feel bad for me.

“It’s not your fault, I just miss him. What I would have given to just run over to him and jump into his arms. To even feel his arms around me again. Fuck.” I quickly blink back tears because I still refuse to let him win. I will not cry.

“Babe, I’m so sorry I wish I could do something for you.” Chastity grabs my hand and gently squeezes it as I lean against the back of my car. I so badly want to just go back inside and drink the day away until I pass out drunk and do it all over again the next day until I no longer have to numb this pain.

“It’s fine. I’m ready to go.” I turn towards Chastity, squeezing her hand back.

“I’ll sit in the back seat of Winter’s car, you two can sit in the front.” Chastity walks to the back of the car and opens the back door behind the driver's seat. I don’t even bother responding. I'm just ready to get this day over with and get to the party where I can drink away my heartache again.

After lunch we head out to the mall to go shopping. I end up buying a black, skin-tight, mini Bodycon dress that I’m lucky even covers my ass. It hugs all my curves and my tits perfectly, fitting my body like it was painted on and showing off my tattoo sleeves, and the tattoos on my thighs since it’s far too short to be wearing. If Creedence saw me, he’d freak out or bend me over and fuck me.

God what I would give for him to push me up against his bed, push my dress up and shove his hard pierced cock into my wet pussy right now. I haven’t had sex or even had the desire to touch myself since he broke up with me. I walk out of my room right as the girls come back to my house, they left after shopping to go get ready at their places because I practically kicked them out so I could nap before getting ready again. I didn’t have to shower or anything. I’d just have to fix my hair and touch up my makeup after changing into my cock teasing dress.

“Holy shit girl, I knew you would look fucking hot in that dress. I’m so glad you just went with it and didn’t bother trying anything else on when we were shopping because you look fucking hot!” Chastity whistles and claps her hands in excitement.

“Holy fuck, if I weren’t straight, I’d totally fuck you girl, you look so hot.” I smile at my best friends who actually brought me out of my mopey mood I’ve been in this afternoon. I actuallyenjoyed myself and had a great time with them once I sobered up.

“You girls look fucking hot yourselves; damn Carsten is lucky to have that piece of ass to go home to every day.” I wink at Winter.

“And girl, you’re going to be pushing guys off of you tonight since your man ain’t comin’ out.” I say to Chastity, who’s been with the same douche for about a year now. We all loved him at first until he cheated on her and she took him back. But that’s her business I just stay out of it and I’m a good friend when she needs someone to vent to.

“Where's Carsten?” I’m confused because he was supposed to be coming with us.

“He went to get Axton and talk to…ummm…” Winter pauses for a second.

“It’s okay, Winter, you can say Creedence,” I tell her with a small smile. It still makes my heart sink through my stomach when I hear his name. But I can’t stop my best friend from talking about him when her soon to be husband, also father of her children, is best friends with him. I’ll just have to learn to suck it up eventually.

“He went to talk to Creedence before he left with us to make sure he’s okay. He’s been drinking a lot too just like you have. I guess he’s been pretty bummed out since you guys broke up,” she says, looking down knowing she feels awkward saying it.

“He should feel bummed out.” I can’t help but roll my eyes. “He’s the asshole that broke up with me, he could be going out withthistonight,” I practically shout, waving my hands up and down my body. Like I’m showing myself off. I’m not conceited one bit. I'm just feeling a little confident tonight especially after being a bum for almost two weeks. I’m thinking maybe I will try to find someone to hook up with tonight if I can get drunk enough to forget they’re not Creedence.

“Well let’s go get the boys then. Well, you guys can, I’ll go by the car.”

“Hell yeah ladies, let’s get fucked up tonight!” Chastity yells, throwing her hands up and doing a little dance.

“Wooo! Let’s get fucked up,” Winter yells along with her.

“Hell yeah bitches!” I shout, laughing along with them, actually excited about this party.

About a half hour later we walk into the party, the house is filled with so many people they’re practically dancing on top of each other, and I fucking love it. The music is so loud the base practically shakes the walls and you can feel the vibrations from it through the floors. The lights are off and there's blue strobe lights that light up the party along with what look like blue Christmas lights lit up around the ceilings and around the baseboards of the floor on every wall. There are two tables with alcohol along with kegs that line the walls with guys standing at the table mixing drinks and passing them out to everyone that walks by. There’s also what looks to be punch bowls I’m assuming filled with whatever alcohol they threw in there too. I can’t wait to get over there and sample all the drinks. Except for the beer, I fucking hate beer.

I haven’t been to a party in so long. Usually this would stress me out with how many people there are but everyone’s giving off such fun vibes, I love it. Either that or it's the fact that I’ll be getting drunk right along with them.

“I’m going to get a drink,” I shout to the girls, walking away from them. I’m at this party to have some fucking fun and I’m not giving a single fuck what they say to me, I’m doing me and I’m having fun. So, I walk away not waiting for an answer from them because I’m sure their first reaction was an eye roll.

I walk over to the table taking the first drink I see and down it right away. That was probably a reckless move right there. Just grabbing a glass off the drink table and trusting that it’s not roofied.

“Hell yeah, baby, did you like that?” the guy passing out drink’s yells to me over the music.

“Yeah, it was strong, what was that?” I ask him, hoping he’ll tell me so I can make these tomorrow at home after I stop at a liquor store of course.

“It's our house secret, we can’t tell you guys what’s in it. Do you want more?” he shouts, and I hold up two fingers. He gives me two cups and I walk away with them, downing the one and throwing it in the first trash can in the middle of the room I see. I walk to the other side of the room where everyone is dancing. Feeling the music and the alcohol I start moving my hips to the music. Holding both hands up dancing when some guy comes up behind me.

“Looks like you could use a drink.” His deep husky voice sends chills through me as he talks into my ear. That’s how close he is to me as I dance, downing my second drink.

I turn to look at a cute blond guy with messy hair, he’s not Creedence but he will do to dance with, for now. He’s tall, not as tall as Creed, about six-foot-two, blue eyes, and built like he works out every day.

“Yeah, I can go for another one.” I stand on my tiptoes and shout loudly by his ear so he can hear me.

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