Page 44 of Darn Knit All

Your version of hiking involved snakes, wolves and a snowstorm. I feel my protests were justified

Theo

It wasn’t that bad

Mai

Tell that to the rangers who had to carry you out…

Theo

And here I was thinking you liked adventure

Airport security always took forever when I traveled. They’d spend extra time doing pat downs and chemical testing to make sure I wasn’t smuggling drugs or ammunition in through my prosthetic.

“And arms,” the bored security guard said, gesturing for me to lift them.

“Don’t worry, the only thing I’m packing is a shit-ton of cheese in my bag,” I told him with a wink.

The guard ignored me, completing his examination.

Guess he didn’t enjoy my cheese jokes.

With a few swipes of some pads, he checked for chemical residue, then dismissed me.

“Next,” he called, turning away.

Free to go, I picked up my bag and made my way to where Mai stood, fiddling anxiously as she glanced around the airport.

“All done?” she asked.

I nodded, watching as she tapped the fingertips of one hand against the ring I’d given her. The Morse-code-like movement had become a tell for her stress levels.

I caught her hand, gently squeezing until her fingers relaxed.

“We’re down here,” I said, leading her toward the terminal. “But you already knew that.”

Her cheeks flushed and she dipped her head, hiding her face behind her curtain of ebony hair. “I may have glanced at the board.”

Mai never left anything to chance. She did better with certainties, working through her anxiety by understanding how things were laid out, what was expected of her, how she shoulddress or behave. Her overpreparation had saved my bacon a time or two, but I knew it cost her mentally and physically.

Following an uneventful plane ride, we were met at the airport by a smiling, peppy young man with the unexpected name of Bruce. Bruces in my opinion were men who sprouted from the earth at the age of forty, with peppered beards, pot bellies and who only drank beer that came in cans.

This Bruce seemed determined to shake my belief in the name to the core. He appeared to be no older than twenty-one, had lime-green hair with a single flop of ice white at his left temple that contrasted sharply with his fake tan. He wore the shit out of a crisp flowing dress that looked like it came from a scene inThe Devil Wears Prada.

I glanced down at my own simple plaid button-up and jeans.We’re not in Kansas anymore, Toto.

Mai clutched my hand as we followed him.

“This way!” Bruce said, quickly navigating the crowds of the airport. “We’ll need to hurry if we’re going to make it on time. The other couples all landed yesterday, but there was an issue booking your tickets so late—that’s what happens when you’re a last-minute addition.”

Mai stumbled and I caught her, holding her close.

“An addition?” she repeated.

“Yeah.” Bruce nodded. “The other couple broke up. Completely understandable—they were nightmares throughout this whole casting process. We were desperate and you two seemed like the best option to replace them at short notice.”

He held the door open for us and we stepped into the midafternoon sun.

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