Page 31 of The Final Rose

“Sosas aren't quitters, mami.” I joke.

She arches her eyebrows and scoffs. “Come on then, you can't tell me you're too tired to help now or I get to lecture you about working too hard.”

“Of course, I can help..” I lie through my teeth.

I don’t last long. When I open my mouth with the third yawn, she sends me to the sofa for a nap. I don’t get a lecture, but a kiss on my temple as she says, “You can’t make good decisions if you’re tired.”

And she must be right because when I close my eyes, I only see Sebastian and how little I want to step away from him.

9.

Sebastian

No one knows Ichanged my ticket to economy. I guess I never bothered to let them know.

The rest of the cast will go first class, but for everyone’s sake, I need time away from Mackenzie. Our intimate date two days ago only cemented the fact I do not know why she’s here.

She's been sending me lascivious looks since I got to the airport, so I’m going to guess it went brilliantly from her point of view.

But I don’t know why I’m bringing Mackenzie. I don't know why from all the girls she’s 1/6 of my pick. It’s like one day I woke up with no control over my life.

I have always been very certain of my choices. Coming toThe Final Rosewas a risk, but a calculated one. It doesn’t feel like that anymore.

I go on dates I don’t want to go. I spend time with people I don’t really care about. Sure, I enjoy Vera and Abby’s company, but I don’t crave it. And I feel like I should crave it.

But the worst part of this mess isher.

Three weeks ago, I found the only person I could trust on this side of the world. Unapologetically real, Callie Sosa was a beam of light.

Now she hurries after the rest of the crew like she can’t possibly pass through airport security beside me. That is just an example of how the last couple of weeks have been.

I don’t know what happened to her, but she changed. One day, like a light switch,everythingchanged.

She avoids me at all costs, and when she has no other option but to deal with my presence, all we talk about is the girls. She avoids any banter and ignores every attempt to be real.

She doesn’t deliver Maverick’s flowers anymore. Instead, it is the same mousy intern who can’t look me in the eye. And even once when I tried to show her what he sent, she got flustered and escaped.

She’s distanced herself from my interviews too. Now I have Anya, who, even though is short and rude, is excellent at doing her job. She’s crafty at taking statements out of me in a way I’m not so comfortable about.

Callie is all about the girls. In their interviews, she’s present. I see them exchanging rushed words all over the mansion.

No words are addressed to me.

It’s pissing me right off.

I hate that hotel and its white walls. I hate the food and I’m tired of the constant hot weather. I'm ready to go back home.

Maverick is ecstatic. He can’t wait to see the set and is hinting at an interview. At least one of us is excited about this whole thing, which proves how things have changed.

Once I’m out of the security, I rush trying to get a glimpse of Callie’s brown hair, but she’s small, the airport is full, and she’s hiding from me.

I hear people by my side, but it’s only when Abby trips and I hold her just in time that I realize the girls are around me. I help her up and offer to bring her bag, which she accepts. Grace calls me a true gentleman, and I offer her a closed-lip smile.

Grace is another one who is lovely and polite, but sometimes I wonder why she’s here. We don’t click. At all. Everything she says to me is superficial. Not because she's shallow. No, she’s lovely, but we have nothing to say to each other.

I shake myself, feeling all too cynical.

My other eliminations weren’t as hard as the first. Primarily because I got to know them better, and I realized that it isn't because someone’s nice that I have to feel attracted to them.

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