Page 28 of Claim Me

When I heard the crack of the man’s hand across my mom’s face and her starving body slam into the car, I got yanked right out of my head. I was running on wild instinct. The door was heavy when I shoved it open and ran to her. I wasn’t big and couldn’t fight. But I still kicked the asshole when I saw my crying mom’s bloody nose.

That man grabbed me by the shirt and lifted me off the ground. I remember how the fabric tore. For a second, I was upset over my bestshirt tearing. Then, the man pulled back his fist and launched it at my face.

Lorrie screamed and tried to block the strike, but it was too late. He punched me right in the nose. I felt like my face exploded. I couldn’t see anything. I thought I was dying. I rarely cried, but a wail of pain and fear burst from my lungs.

My mom wrapped her thin arms around me and used her body as a shield as the man began kicking us and yelling for me to shut up. I heard Bubby crying in the car. Despite my empty belly, I wished I hadn’t complained about being hungry. If I had stayed quiet, Lorrie wouldn’t have met this man. Everything would be better. I asked for too much and made everything worse.

The man’s voice shifted. I heard Lorrie’s sobs change. The noises around us were different. I noticed new voices. I worried the people would hurt Bubby.

“What the fuck is this?” Caveman hollered that night.

I peeked out from under Lorrie. My vision was blurred. I wasn’t sure what I was seeing at first. The man fell to the ground next to us. Lorrie shuffled away from him, but I wanted to get closer and see the fear on his face. His panic turned to rage when he noticed me staring at him.

Suddenly, his face exploded like mine had. Caveman’s boot rained down blow after blow. Lorrie hid my eyes after the man's nose caved into his destroyed face.

I don’t remember a lot of details about that night. I know we got to see a doctor and had a nice warm bed to sleep in. Oh, and we ate! I remember my stomach being so full when I cuddled with my mom and brother that night. I was happy enough to nearly forget my broken face.

Meeting Caveman made things better for Bubby and me. But Lorrie used her new friends as an excuse to run away. She would disappear for weeks or even months. When she returned, her body would be battered and her mind more scattered. She became less and less like the woman who played with me when I was little.

Lorrie was a train wreck, nothing more than dead weight, a waste of space, and all the other bad things people said about her. But I loved her more than I ever loved anyone else. When she died, I wanted to die, too.

That’s why living with Caveman and the people in the hills wasn’t enough to save me. I had to go to the farm, where I could getanother mama. Aunt Fred hugged me and kept me close for years. I felt better, but I never forgot what was stolen from me when Lorrie got lost in her madness.

“I don’t want my kid to have fucked up parents,” I admit to Caveman as the pain over losing my mom burns a hole through me. “I don’t want my kid to hate himself.”

Caveman pats my back while I struggle to control the same pain holding me back all my life. When I was a kid, I wished he would love my mom and make her healthy. But Caveman was an asshole with no heart for loving a woman. He isn’t wrong about that.

“The twins aren’t perfect,” Caveman says, making me scowl at him. “They’re obnoxious little dummies who can’t even multiply by fives.”

“They’re only in first grade.”

“I still think they’re dumb.” Rolling my eyes, I hate how Caveman chuckles at my irritation. “They’re overly dramatic and get scared over stupid stuff. Yet, they’re not scared of bears at all. Everyone should be afraid of bears, but those little dummies think they’re cute.”

Caveman drinks his coffee and shrugs. “Despite them being bad at math and bear survival, they’re normal kids. Their parents broke up. Their dad is a dipshit. Their mom is notorious for pitching fits. Yet, the twins are perfectly okay. Why should your kid be any different?”

“It might die. Lots of babies die in their moms and even after they’re born.”

“That’s the kind of positive thinking I expect from you.”

“I want to be prepared for the bad things that can happen.”

“No,” Caveman grumbles and musses my hair. “Stop using your fucking head and just let your heart do what it wants.”

“That seems opposite of what you should be saying.”

“Your head is wired wrong, boyo,” Caveman says and glances out at the road. “That’s why you didn’t make your move with Siobhan years ago. You get all wound up on stupid shit. But your heart knows she’s the lass for you. You and Sync are a lot alike, but you have the one quality he always lacked, and that’s loyalty. You’re a step up for her, not down. Yet, your fucked-up brain won’t ever let you see that.”

Maybe I’m feeling broken down from thinking about my mom, but Caveman’s words hit me harder than usual. I always thought I wasa lesser Sync. Caveman’s right, though. I’d never cheat on Siobhan. If she let me close, I’d never get restless or need my space.

“Should I act like me on the date?” I ask Caveman. “Is there a date routine people use?”

“Siobhan isn’t a lass you met on the street. You can’t pretend to be anyone except you. Besides, you’re looking to keep her, so honesty seems like a smarter move.”

“I don’t know how to date.”

“It’s not dating. It’s spending time with Siobhan. You know how to do that.”

“Maybe Idothink too much.”

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