Page 61 of Better Hide

I snort. “Not the normal kind! But that one is pretty banging, too. I make mine special.”

“Tell me,” Cole says. He looks so enraptured that I laugh softly. “Well, I shred my own cheese and use corkscrew noodles. Easier to get them filled with sauce.”

Cole licks his lips. “Sold. What are corkscrew noodles?”

I laugh. “They’re like the normal ones, but bigger.”

“Is it like the baked kind?”

“Yeah! But it’s not dry.” I feel hunger and nostalgia dance through me just talking about it. “There’s evaporated milk and cream, and I mix my own seasoning. It’s crispy and creamy and stringy. It’s so good.” My mouth waters just thinking about it. Fuck, I want to make that again.

Cole is silent, and I look at him. He’s looking at me, his eyes soft. Then, he says something that makes me freeze. “I see why everyone fell in love with you.”

I blink, my mouth suddenly dry. The silence stretches on. “What?” The word comes out squeaky.

Cole suddenly reaches to my face, and I flinch back.

“Just fixing your hair, lemon drop,” he says softly, brushing my hair aside. “I can see why everyone fell in love with you online. You’re beautiful when you talk about the things that you love.”

I swallow hard. Despite myself, warmth runs through my chest. Discomfort also battles for control. No one has ever implied something like this before, and I don’t know what to do. Mom and Dad always said they loved me, but it never meant anything. My exes always said it so absently.

I swallow again, asking softly, “Why’d you come after me?”

Cole’s throat bobs slowly. “Because I wanted you, Mary Jo Hall. Always have.”

A rush of fear and warmth overcomes me, battling even harder for control. I don’t say anything. I can’t.

A bit of pain graces Cole’s face, and he asks, “Why’d you hide?”

I stare at the dark ceiling, listening to Jayden’s breathing. “Because I was scared.”

“Of what?”

My stomach clenches, and the silence drags on. Then softly, so softly, I whisper, “This.”

Cole is silent. When I finally get the courage to look at him, he’s watching me intently. I see the hurt in his eyes again, and I feel another sharp bite of pain again.

“It’s not you,” I say quickly. “Well, I don’t know. I guess…” I glance down. “I don’t know how to say it.”

“Try,” he whispers.

I pull in a breath. I can’t say it. That I’m afraid this isn’t real. That I’m just a game he’ll get bored of as soon as he wins.

“I’m afraid.” It’s all I can get out.

Cole softly grabs my hand. “I will never hurt you, Jo. Not where it counts.” He reaches out and taps my chest. “Not here.”

I stare at the sheets.

“Look at me,” Cole demands, his tone harsh. I glance up. Cole’s eyes soften. “I promise I’ll never get tired of you. And if I do, you can stab me with that knife under your pillow. I’m not a liar, Jo. You’re the first woman I’ve ever been interested in.”

“Why?” My voice comes out soft.

Cole’s gaze grows distant for a second, then comes back to me. “Because I see you, Jo. When I look into your eyes,I see you.I see a girl with fire and spunk. One who’s had to fight for every scrap of love she’s ever been given. One who’s still funny and sassy despite all that. And when I look at you, I see a little bit of me.” Cole clears his throat.

We fall into silence as I debate what to say next, if anything at all. We’ve gotten too vulnerable way too fast, and it scares me.

Almost as if he can read my mind, Cole squeezes my hand and then lets go. “Hey, enough of the pillow talk. Unless you want to get up and make me that heavenly mac ‘n cheese, let’s get back to sleep, hmmm?” Cole puts his arm around me and draws me in.

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