Page 47 of Redeeming Heart

He stood up from the table and left the kitchen without saying a word. I was left dumbfounded and thought that maybe it was too much for him.

I carried on eating when he came back with a small box. His hands were shaking as he placed the gift-wrapped box down in front of me.

His eyes were glued to the box as if he was afraid it was going to vanish into thin air if he was going to release it. “She made me promise that I will give this to you.”

I, at first didn’t grasp what he was saying until he continued.

“Mom left you one last letter before she passed away. I never had the heart to give it to you and she told me that I should give it to you when you are ready.” He said releasing it and sitting down on the chair beside me.

I stared at the box with big, round eyes and I didn’t know how to react. I softly touched the light pink box and slowly pulled the string before lifting the lid. With a quivering smile, I lifted my eyes to meet my father’s eyes.

“It smells like her.” She loved vanilla.

A gasp snuck out between my lips when my eyes landed on a framed picture of her and me when she became ill.

I also took notice of a butterfly necklace when I pulled out the framed picture.

“How did she get this?” I asked with a teary smile, picking it up and holding it in the air. I saw this in a jewelry shop when she and I went shopping before she got ill and got hospitalized

“She made me go buy it.” My father said through his tears.

“She even made me look for a golden envelope because that’s just how she was.”

I gazed back down and noticed a golden envelope with my name written on top in her handwriting when my father mentioned it.

I lowered the necklace and with shaky hands pulled the sealed envelope out.

Was I ready to read the last words she wrote down? Was I ready for that reminder of overwhelming heartache that she was gone?

I lowered the envelope when I realized I wasn’t ready.

I wasn’t ready to lose her for a second time and have to say goodbye for good.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

I still couldn’t grasp what happened last night between my father and me. I wasn’t even sure if the wall between us had finally come down. There was still so much that needed to be said. Especially the letter that has been haunting me since dad handed it over to me last night.

Call me a namby-pamby but I wasn’t up for the feeling of my heart torn up again and a big part of me was still holding onto her. I couldn’t let go even though I know she was gone but it was difficult to convince my heart.

“Your mind seems to be a bit preoccupied today,” Clarissa said coming up to me while I was pushing the hockey ball around with my hockey stick.

I just shrugged. I wasn’t in the mood to talk about my problems.

“I’ve noticed that you’ve been hanging out with Brandon lately.”

I was amused by her observations.

“Did you come over here to tell me to keep as far as possible from him because you aren’t over him?”

I wasn’t an expert when it came to dating but I’ve seen too many films that have the same storyline and it was getting kind of boring but who was I to judge?

She giggled. “Oh, god, no. That boat has sailed and sunk a very long time ago.”

She then knocked the hockey ball over to me and we start to knock it around between us.

“Then why are we talking about him?”

She let out a loud chuckle and pulled up her shoulders. “I maybe thought it could be a way to start a conversation.”

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