Page 46 of Redeeming Heart

Pulling away from him to look him in the eyes. I saw his tears and something made me realize his heart was also ripped out from his chest when she passed away. He didn’t leave her side from the moment they met and it is the first time in years that he is alone.

“I didn’t want to talk about her because there is nothing, I can do to bring her back.” The tears were now flowing down his cheeks.

“When you didn’t come back home last night. I was reminded of the pain I felt when I lost her. I can’t lose you as well, Sasha. You are all I’ve got left of her.”

“That’s the part I hate the most when people look at me and they see mom instead of me. I feel invisible.” He shook his head at me.

“You are an amazing human being. Beautiful, strong, and weird. You just have your mom’s spirit of chasing things and fighting for them on your terms.”

“I’m sorry for the things I’ve done to you.” He apologized. “Forgetting about your feelings. Lecturing you when all I had to do was be there for you. I realize now this engagement with Meredith is too sudden and I will even place it on hold,” I shook my head.

“No,” I was even surprised by my outburst.

“Mom never wanted you to be alone and there is a thirteen-year-old boy who loves you like you are his father. You will only break his heart and most importantly you will destroy Meredith because she truly cares for you.”

“You are my daughter and you come first.”

For three years I have waited for him to say that.

“And it feels amazing to hear that but you can’t put your life on halt because of me. Just acknowledge my presence and treat me like a person. I know I’ve messed up terribly but I wanted you to see that I was hurting.”

He nodded.

“I have finally opened my eyes and came to realize that I was wrong.”

He embraced me again with a hug.

“I love you, kiddo. I have always and will forever.”

“Love you too, dad.” I sniffled wiping away a fallen tear.

“Hot chocolate?” I snickered softly when he remembered how hot chocolate fixed everything back in the day.

“It’s too hot for hot chocolate.” I pointed out.

He thought for a while and realized I was right.

“Well, Meredith bought chocolate ice cream.”

I smiled. “Sounds like a plan.” I didn’t care if it was close to midnight but I was going to share a bowl of ice cream with my dad. It’s been too long since we spend any time together.

He even made sure we had wafer biscuits to dip into the ice cream.

“Maggie told me that you are playing again.” He brought it up while getting spoons.

I nodded.

“Coach Peterson was putting a team together and I was on his list of recruiters. I, at first turned him down but then I craved to be part of something again that didn’t get me into trouble.”

“You won your first game today.” He noted, handing me a spoon.

“Yeah, it was quite incredible but overwhelming,” I admitted.

“I know I haven’t said this for a long time but I am proud of you. She always wanted you to chase down your dreams because your passion was even stronger than hers.”

“Do you love, Meredith?” I know I was moving away from the subject but I had to know. “Or do you love the idea of her?”

“Meredith is a completely different person when you compare her to mom but she makes me happy. She fixed my broken heart and was patient with my heartache. She still is and I feel extremely disappointed with myself that I have to put her through all of this. She has her own problems to deal with.” His eyes focused on mine for a minute too long and I was starting to become nervous.

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