Page 65 of Chase Our Forever

It stays quiet between us for a while. I don’t try to fill it, instead hoping if I give her enough time to think that she’ll decide to trust me.

“I don’t know where to start,” she finally confesses. “I’m not that interesting.”

I shake my head. “Anything about you is interesting to me.”

She tries to fight a smile by pulling her lip between her teeth, but it doesn’t work for long. Her lips spread into a soft smile as her perfect, deep dimples make an appearance. “I just don’t want you to feel bad for me. I grew up in not the best of circumstances, but I’m okay. I’mmorethan okay right now.” Her voice gets softer with the last sentence, but even though her tone is soft, it packs a punch to my heart.

I hope she means she’s more than okay right now because she’s here safe with Clara and me. That maybe things didn’t used to be great for her, but she feels differently now.

All in all, I just hope she feels happy. Happy enough to stay here with us. Maybe even forever if we’re lucky. I try not to think about what that actually means for me to want something like that. It’s not something I’m ready to face, not tonight.

“I know what it’s like to have people pity you, sunshine. I know you’re too strong to be pitied. I can already tell you that I’ll never pity you. Whatever you’ve had to endure, I care enough about you to want to protect you from ever having to face it again.”

Her mouth parts as a small little gasp falls from her lips. She blinks a few times, as if she’s completely stunned by my words. I repeat them in my head, wondering if I said too much. “Why are you looking at me like that?” My eyes scan her face as my heartpicks up speed. Hopefully, I didn’t say the wrong thing. I was just letting myself be honest with her and not hold back with her for once.

“You said you care about me.” Her voice is hesitant, as if she’s also unsure if she should be saying it out loud or not.

I frown a little. “Of course I care about you. I thought that was obvious.”

She lifts her eyebrows. “Is anything obvious with you, Dean Livingston?”

I grunt as I narrow my eyes at her a little. She has a fair point. It does make me annoyed with myself a little that I have her questioning if I care about her or not. The problem has never been if I cared about her. It’s been that I care about her too much, and it happened quicker than I ever expected.

“You don’t have to tell me everything about your past and what it looked like. Just tell me something. Anything.”

She nods her head as she shifts her position on the swing. She doesn’t pull her feet from my lap. If anything, she nestles them against my stomach as if she’s trying to warm them up with my body heat. “There’s not that much to it, I promise. Mom left me as a newborn with my father and never came back. The man she left me with was not prepared—or fit—to be a father. He was a drug addict, had a mean temper, and ran with bad people. I was in and out of his care as a child. Saved for years to be able to leave home when I finally turned eighteen. Found out a week before my birthday my father had found my stash and spent it all on drugs. Secretly saved again for years to get away, and here I am.”

I stare at her in disbelief. I have so many more questions, but I don’t want to bombard her with them. One stands out more than the others. I swallow, rage already seeping into my veins at her story without even knowing the answer to my next question. “Did he ever hurt you?”

The sad smile she gives me tells me everything I need to know. I clench my jaw as the rage inside me builds.

“I’m okay, Dean. Promise. I got out.”

A strangled noise comes from deep in my throat as I want to fire off a million questions at once. The biggest being what her father’s name is and how do I find him. He deserves hell after what he put her through, and I know she hasn’t even told me all of it.

As a single father to a daughter, I can’t imagine ever putting my daughter in harm’s way. My entire existence revolves around Clara. I’m constantly wondering about how to keep her safe. I go to bed every night worrying if she felt loved. I can’t imagine how Liv must’ve felt in her own home. She was let down by the two people who were supposed to love her the most in this world. How could her father live with himself after treating her this way? He doesn’t even deserve to be related to someone as beautiful and incredible as Liv.

Liv leans forward so that our faces are only inches apart. She rests her forearms on her knees as her eyes briefly look at my lips before looking me in the eyes again. “Whatever you’re thinking right now, stop,” she whispers. “He’s not worth any more of your thoughts.”

“Will he come looking for you?” Panic starts to build as I imagine him coming to Sutten to find her. She’s made it sound like she’s been careful enough that there’s no way he’d know where she is, but it doesn’t stop me from worrying.

Liv shakes her head, giving me the smallest bit of relief. “No. He won’t waste his time on that.”

My chest still feels tight, but I have to accept her answer. She sounds confident, and that gives me the smallest piece of mind. “Okay,” I respond.

“Now, let’s not talk about him. He doesn’t deserve it.”

I nod, and before I think better of it, I’m reaching out and cupping her cheek. “Tell me something else then. If you could be anywhere in the world, do anything in the world, what would it be?”

She smiles, and I love that she nuzzles deeper into my touch. I crave a physical connection with her. Just the simple press of our skin lights something deep inside me. “That’s a hard question. I love it here in Sutten. It’s everything I imagined a small town to be and more.”

“Okay, so if you could do anything here in Sutten, what would it be?”

“I love being Clara’s nanny. It feels like I have a family again between you two, your family, Pippa, Lexi. Everyone in this small town has accepted me this last month. I’m happy being a nanny.”

Her words comfort me. There’s nothing I want more than for her to want to stay here. But I also wonder if she’s ever allowed herself to dream big, to want more for herself. “Think bigger.” My words come out pleading, and I’m not sure why. She’s given me the answer I should want. I should want her to want to be Clara’s nanny forever. But Clara won’t always need a nanny, and for some reason, I want Liv to envision herself doing something different in Sutten when that time comes. Maybe then she won’t leave.

Even in the dim lights of the porch, I can see the blush that creeps up her cheeks. “I think it’d be fun to work at a bookstore. Maybe Bluebird Books will have an opening for me when the time comes.”

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