Page 98 of Unexpected Boyfriends

Sex with Jordy is kind of familiar and kind of not. We were with each other long enough to know how to get each other off pretty fast. The sex is quick, rough and hard, and afterwards we lie side by side on my bed, panting heavily as we recover. There’s nothing tender or sweet or loving about our interactions, like there was with Justin, and neither of us has felt the urge to kiss. The physical release is good, but no other part of me is satisfied.

“Mind if I have a shower before I go?”

“Sure. Towels are in the bathroom.”

Jordy hasn’t forgotten the layout of my house and he gets up and goes for a shower without hesitation. Now we’re done, I’m keen for him to leave, so after wiping myself down with last night's dirty shirt, I pull on some trackpants and wait for him to finish getting dressed. I’ll clean up after he’s gone.

Less than ten minutes later, I’m holding the front door open for him.

“See ya round,” he says as he leaves, “It was good to catch up.”

We’re sort of friends again, so we fist-bump as he heads out the door.

Chapter 42

Sydney

AXEL

Jordy’s only been gone thirty seconds, when he’s back ringing the doorbell.

“What the fuck did you forget?” I snap as I grudgingly open the door. It’s late, I’m tired, we’ve fucked, I feel empty and I don’t want him hanging around.

Only, when I open the door, it’s not Jordy standing there.

A familiar figure with dirty-blond hair is on my doorstep with the bleakest look on his face.

“Justin?”

Oh fuck.It’s so soon after Jordy left that there’s no way they haven’t run into each other on his way in.

“Was that…? What’shedoing leaving your place in the middle of the night?” he demands. But he knows. I can read his face easily and the hurt I see there crushes me. I feel completely and utterly sick. I’m sure my guilt is written all over my face.

“You got over me pretty quick,” he says bitterly, when he finally speaks. My heart twists. That’s not how it is.

“It was just a fuck, it meant nothing,” I whisper. “I didn’t think I’d ever see you again.”

He frowns, like something doesn't compute. I can see him turning thoughts over in his mind, and the question he wants to ask, but won’t.

“You were never just that for me,” I tell him, pleading with my whole being for him to believe me. Now that he's finally here, is he going to turn and run?

He takes a deep, stuttering breath, and draws himself upright. He doesn’t look at me.

“Can I come in?”

“Of course.” I mumble, opening the door wider and stepping aside to let him pass.

He makes as if to go to my bedroom, like we’ve always done when he’s been here, but then he falters. I shake my head. I don’t want him to go in there. The bed is messed and the room will smell of sex. If he goes in there, I’ll lose him forever, if I haven’t already.

I steer him towards the couch and sit down. Justin lowers himself cautiously onto the opposite end. As far as he can get from me. Clearly, he’s come to talk, but finding Jordy here has thrown him. I desperately want to bridge the distance between us, but I daren’t touch him. I don’t even know why he’s here.

“Why are you here?” I need to know.

Instead of answering, he asks a question of his own.

“If you were so upset that I was going to stay at my parents' that night, why didn't you just say so? Why did you ghost me? And then you left without trying to work things out with me. You just left. And then… nothing.”

I draw in a deep breath, trying to centre myself and keep what’s left of my composure, although I’m kidding myself if I think I’m more than one step away from completely breaking down.

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