Page 38 of Someone You Deserve

I sigh wistfully. “She is. I know she’s going to keep me on my toes, but I love watching her grow into her own person. She’s loving her dance classes, is reading so well on her own now, and loves going to school, which I’m so grateful for because Bentley had separation issues when he was younger.” I sigh and admit, “I just hope I don’t mess the two of them up somehow, you know?”

Willow moves her eyes down to her lap as she fiddles with the bottom of her sweater. “Astrid, trust me. My parents died when I was two and they still messed me up. I don’t think there’s a way to get around that.”

I close my eyes and sigh. “Shit. I’m sorry, Willow. I didn’t even think about that…”

“Don’t apologize, hon.” She lifts her eyes back to mine. “I’m just saying, there’s no telling the future. The only thing you can do is love them with everything you have, and make sure you take care of yourself too. You are a remarkable mother, Astrid, and I don’t say that lightly. I’m in awe of you and want you to know that.”

Trying not to cry, I croak out, “Thank you.”

A few weeks ago, Willow sat down with me and told me the entire story of how she ended up in Carrington Cove, inheriting a house from a mystery benefactor who had known her parents. She shared her childhood with me, how she grew up with her godparents, and how she met her best friend Shauna in college. When she unveiled who the man was that left her the house, I couldn’t hide my shock. After we shared several tears, she vowed not to hide anymore secrets from me, even though I didn’t fault her for being cautious about sharing personal details. I happen to have a little bit of experience with that as well. But it felt good to really get to know the woman sitting across from me, a friend that feels like she was destined to be in my life.

And it’s that realization that has me preparing to admit my recent life development before I explode. I take a big sip of wine before I blurt, “I’m going on a date next week.”

Willow’s eyes snap back over to me. “Oh my God! Who’s the lucky guy?”

“Richard Cockwell.” At that, she lets out a surprised laugh that she tries to cover with a fake cough. Ignoring her, I add, “He’s a regular at the bakery who asked me on a date out of the blue last week. We went to high school together, and now he’s a teacher there.”

“Well…that’s great!” she finally says, far too cheerily. “Do you like him?”

“I mean, yeah. He’s a nice guy.”

Willow narrows her eyes at me. “Just nice? He’s your first date in four years and you’re settling fornice?”

I throw my free hand up in the air. “What’s wrong with nice? There aren’t exactly a lot of single men in this town. He asked me out and it felt good to be pursued. Yeah, I’m nervous, but how bad can it be?”

Willow shrugs. “Well, my dating experience is pretty minimal, but I don’t know…I feel like you should be more excited about your first date in years. It’s a big deal!”

Chewing on my bottom lip, I say, “I think I’m more excited about not having to cook a meal and getting to talk to another adult for the night rather than the date part.”

Willow smirks. “Can’t say that I disagree with you there. I guess I just figured if you went out with anyone…it would be Penn.”

My stomach instantly knots and I tilt my head at her. “Why would you think that?”

She folds in her lips and then it’s her turn to take a big gulp of wine. “No reason,” she murmurs, avoiding my eyes.

“Willow Marshall, what aren’t you telling me?” I purse my lips as she squirms on the other end of the couch. Our eyes lock, and her silence speaks volumes.

“I mean…you don’t see it?”

“See what?” I ask, leaning forward slightly in my seat.

“The way he looks at you, Astrid.”

That sends a chill straight down my spine. The reality is, I’ve been so concerned with not showing howIfelt abouthimthat I haven’t really considered howhefeels aboutme. And so much time has passed since that night when our lips touched and my life was forever changed. The truth is, I put him in the friend zone after that just so I could be around him and have some semblanceof control.

But I’ve seen it.

Hell, I’vefeltit.

And I’ve fantasized about what it would be like to give myself permission to kiss him again.

“I haven’t noticed,” I lie.

Willow arches a brow. “You haven’t noticed, or you haven’tletyourself see it?” I take a swig of my wine, avoiding answering. “That’s what I thought.”

“It’s complicated, Willow.”

“Then explain it to me.” She situates herself into the cushion, tucking her legs up under her. “Because I know I haven’t been here very long, but it only took a couple of encounters with you two to see the affection there. And I’m pretty sure you feel the same way about Penn as he feels about you.”

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