Page 58 of Reverse Perspective

Lance gets out and sets me on my feet before helping me slip my feet into sandals. Mason and Dean get out and come around to hug me.

“Thank you for finding me,” I whisper when Mason hugs me.

“He will never put his hand on you again, Sadie,” Mason swears.

“You don’t know that, he…” I say.

“He willneverput his hands on you again, Sadie,” Mason repeats when he pulls away to look at me. “I swear to you right now… He will never hurt you again.”

“He’s going to get away with it again,” I say as I tear up.

“We don’t know that just yet. Let’s just do this part and file charges,” Dean says as he pulls me close to hug me. “Just one step at a time.”

“Let’s do this so I can take a shower,” I sigh. Lance takes my hand and we go inside. Right away a nurse greets me. I suddenly can’t talk again when I see there are so many people in the waiting room. Lance tells her why I’m there and I am spared the panic attack when she immediately takes me back to a room.

Two nurses come in and explain the process for the rape examination. Because I lost consciousness in the beginning, they suggest that I do the full exam since I don’t know what they did. I do know though. I can still feel their hands on my body. I feel unclean in a way that I don’t think will ever go away. They ruined me; broke me.

I stay in a dazed state through the entire exam. Lance holds my hand the entire time I am in his presence and makes sure that I don’t slip away completely. When she is done, she gives me sweatpants and a T-shirt to dress in since they took the shirt.

I am sitting on the edge of the hospital bed with my head laid on Lance’s shoulder when a cop comes into the room. “Are you Ms. Graves?” he asks. Immediately I don’t like his tone. He looks amused as he stands in front of me.

“Yeah,” I say in a small voice.

“The nurse said that you disclosed a rape that you wish to file a report on. Is this correct?”

“Yes,” I say.

“Okay. So, the initial findings of the exam show no indication of assault. I want you to be fully aware of what that means,” he says.

“He raped me,” I say matter-of-factly. “They both raped me more than once. I think.”

“You think?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.

“When I woke up… I could tell one of them had done something,” I say. “The first time they raped me I just… it’s like I disassociated. I stayed like that until they found me. I think they raped me multiple times I just don’t know how many. I just remember feeling their hands on me.”

“So… I’m going to be transparent with you,” the cop says. “I’ve seen the video. Are you sure you want to report this?”

“Are you fucking kidding me?” Lance snaps at the cop. “Why don’t you just do your fucking job and take the report.”

“All I’m saying is from this end of things, there’s not much to report,” the cop says bluntly.

That was his plan though. He didn't hurt me because he knew the guys would find me. He knew his time was limited, so he made it appear as consensual as possible. After the video was leaked, my credibility was shot. No court would see that video and be able to set aside their sexism for long enough to believe that I could be raped. With no evidence to back it up, Paul and Leo will get away with it. Nothing will happen to them and they know it.

“I just wanna go home,” I tell Lance quietly. “I told you it was pointless. No one will believe me.”

“Are you sure?” Lance asks me, softening his voice when he talks to me.

“Please take me home,” I say tearfully. He nods and stands up. I don’t object when he scoops me up and walks out. A few nurses say something to us. Something about antibiotics and something to make sure I don’t get pregnant should my birth control fail. She has sadness in her voice when she talks. They try to get me to sign but I just stay quiet and don’t move. She lets Lance sign, even though I don’t think he should be able to, but I won’t complain. I just want to take a shower.

By the time he gets me into the car, I’ve completely shut down. I can hear everything going on around me, but I probably appear to be out of it entirely.

“What’s wrong?” Mason asks when Lance shuts the door.

“That fucking cop basically said she had nothing to report because she wasn’t injured and the video,” Lance says with anger still in his voice. “She just… shut down.”

“It’s a lot to process,” Mason says softly. No matter how soft or kind he is making his voice, I can still hear the anger.

“How the fuck is that fair?” Dean asks.

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