Page 36 of Pack to the Wall

“Take her for a walk,” Tyson told me. “Calm her down. Do what you have to. I don’t want to turn her like this.”

“What I have to?” I asked with a single brow raised. I lowered my voice for the next part. “Does that include what we talked about earlier?”

Tyson had told me about Bronn’s interest in Jane and their thoughts and concerns about multiple mates. I’d told him I definitely wanted to be a part of that… as long as that’s what Jane wanted.

Tyson glanced over his shoulder at Jane, then back to me. He wore the oddest smile. “Yeah, it does. And gods, I wish I was you right now, but I don’t think Jane and I are ready for what might happen if we were left alone together.” He sighed, clearly craving her, but restraining himself. “Distract her, however she needs. I’d prefer if she was in a good mood when I turn her.” There were myths and legends about how a person’s emotional state when turned could flavor their entire life as a shifter. I was pretty sure they were just myths… but then why risk it.

I nodded to Tyson, then went to Jane. “You look like you could use a break. Let Tyson and Kira take care of things for a bit. Come for a walk with me. There’s something I want to show you.”

“All I want to see right now is Ginny’s head on a pole!” she hissed.

“I know, but trust me, this will be good,” I said with a bit of a laugh. “Come on,” I urged, and she sighed, then relented, and let me escort her out of the house.

It was a beautiful early fall day, warm and bright, some of the leaves just starting to change. I pointed her toward the park and forest off the dead-end loop of her street.

Jane huffed and grumbled, tense and upset as we walked. The park had been where the pack had left our bikes and kept our things at night before we’d met Jane. The marks of our bikes still marred the green lawns.

She marched beside me, silent, as we headed past that and into the wood, but I knew she was still struggling with her roiling emotions. They tainted her scent. She smelled more like dried grass and sunburn. Also, like I had the day before, I felt her rage physically, like a heat on my side. She was a powerful little woman.

I wanted to touch her.

“You mind if I…?” I reached out and laid my hand tentatively on her back, rubbing slightly.

She sighed and seemed to melt into my touch a little. “No.”

I rubbed her back for a bit as I led her through the trees, then switched to her shoulder, eventually pulling her just a bit closer to drape my arm around her, rubbing her arm. It felt natural to have her leaning against me like that. She tilted her head to rest on my upper arm, the top of her head roughly level with my shoulder.

“Why…?” she breathed. I sensed uncertainty ripple through her. She didn’t know how to go on.

“Just say it,” I whispered.

“Why do I feel so comfortable around you? I shouldn’t. I hardly know you and you’re a huge man who I certainly shouldn’t have gone into the woods alone with, but…”

“I’d never hurt you, babe,” I whispered. “For one, you’re Tyson’s mate, and I’d never do anything to hurt him. But also… you’re…”

How did I tell her how I felt? That she reminded me far too much of a woman I’d once loved who my father had killed just to spite me.

She huffed a breath. “Just say it,” she echoed my words from a moment ago.

Fuck it, why not. “I was in love a while back. She was older than I was, but I didn’t care. She thought she was plain and unattractive, but she was beautiful to me. She didn’t care that I was all busted up inside. She loved me anyway and that… that meant everything to me. I felt comfortable with her, like nothing I’d ever felt before. Then… she died.” I sighed. Jane didn’t need to know the horrific, gory details. “You remind me of her. Something in your soul, how kind and caring you are… and that look you get, like you’re not worth anything, even though you’re a wonderful, beautiful person.”

She stopped walking and I was forced to stop with her. Turning, she looked up at me, confused. “Do you really mean that?”

“Every word,” I said softly.

“You’ve only known me for a day,” she whispered.

“Doesn’t matter. I saw how you stood up to Harley to protect your own. I see how you want to help Petra, even though you don’t know her. You didn’t have to take us into your house, we could be camped on your lawn, but you did. You care for your kids, which to you probably seems mandatory, but it definitely isn’t in my world. I don’t need to know everything about you to know you’ve got a good heart, that you’re kind and loving and generous and passionate and strong.”

She stared up at me for a long moment, her eyes searching mine. I felt like she could see my pain, the knot of rage and resentment in my soul.

“Two days ago, I thought you were all ruffians and brutes,” she said slowly. “But you and Bronn and Tyson… You’ve protected me, helped me, spoken softly and gently to me.” She shook her head again. “Tyson and I are fated, and you and Bronn joined him as my betas, but… Why? Why would you do something like that? Because I look like some woman you used to know?” Her brow furrowed again. “And why do I feel so safe around you? I really shouldn’t.”

I swallowed a lump in my throat. I wasn’t sure exactly why she felt safe around me, but I was very glad for it. I’d spent my life trying to be everything my father wasn’t, but in a gang like ours, that wasn’t easy. I’d had to be a brute at times. I’d hurt people at the command of my alpha. But I’d hated it, where my father had reveled in it. Perhaps that was what she was sensing?

“I’ve been forced to be a brute,” I whispered. “But I never wanted to be. I want to be like you. And now that you’re our alpha, I guess… I’m allowing myself to finally be who I want to be. I know you won’t command me to hurt an innocent person, but I’m certainly willing to defend you against another brute, if needed. You’re a good person. I couldn’t protect other good people in the past, but I can now. I don’t know, maybe that’s what you’re feeling from me?”

“Maybe it is,” she said softly. “I don’t know.” Then she breathed a laugh. “I wish talking to Tyson was this easy.”