Page 21 of Pack to the Wall

I pummeled that pillow with both fists for longer than I thought I could, sweaty and bedraggled by the end. I’d even thrown off my suit jacket, continuing with the onslaught. And when I was done, weak and weary, I just wept, falling into Tyson, who held me against him, strong arms enfolding me, holding me close, holding me up, that battered pillow pressed between us.

When my tears dried, he asked, “Better?”

I nodded against his solid chest.

“Time to plan?” he asked.

I nodded again and pulled away from him. That poor pillow was toast now; I’d burst it open and the stuffing was coming out. I couldn’t afford to do that too many more times.

I flopped down, sitting on the bed. “Just how… how do I do this?” I asked, feeling defeated. It hadn’t even been a full day and I was already at my wits’ end.

Tyson climbed onto the bed and crawled behind me. His strong hands came to my shoulders and began massaging sore muscles with vigorous efficiency.

“One day at a time,” he said softly. “Today is set up and planning. We’ll figure out a rough strategy for the rest of the week. Tomorrow will be implementation. Your betas will put the plan into action while you rest.”

“Why am I resting?” I asked. “I get the feeling that won’t go over well.” Wasn’t I supposed to be a strong alpha or something?

“You’re resting because I’ll have turned you, and you won’t be feeling yourself.”

“Oh,” I said, a shiver running through me. I swallowed a lump in my throat. “Will it hurt?”

“Yes. I won’t lie.” Yet his voice was soft and low, soothing. “To be sure, I’ll need to cut you deep enough for a good bit of blood. I’ll do the same to myself and make sure our blood mixes. We can fix you up after that, but that wound is still going to hurt… and you’ll start to feel disoriented and dizzy. It will get worseas the day goes on, until the moon rises tomorrow. Then you’ll shift. The first time is always painful. Your body is remaking itself. It’s like all your bones break at once and all your joints are pulled out.”

“I could have done with just a little lying there,” I said, sounding meek. The whole thing sounded utterly horrible. “It gets better, though?”

“Yeah. There’s always a little pain when you shift, but after a while it’s more like a stubbed toe, annoying for a moment, then gone.”

“Oh…” I released a heavy breath. “Good.”

“But tomorrow will probably be the worst pain of your life. You can ask my mom what the pain was like compared to childbirth. Then you’ll be a wolf and you’ll want to hunt. You’ll be ravenous. We can let you loose out in the woods. That would be best, so you can really get a sense for the hunt or, if you like, we can stock up on steaks and just feed you here. The pack would probably think you a weak alpha, though. We only do that when we’re trapped somewhere without nature. When we have to.”

“I think staying in will be better, no matter what it looks like to the pack. I’m more worried about what it will look like to my neighbors if you’re carrying me off into the woods while I look like I’m dying. They didn’t call the cops on me for killing Harley, but I think more than a few would call them if they saw that.”

He grunted. “Hmmm, yeah, you’re probably right.” He sighed. “We’ll make it work.”

“Okay, so… rest, shift, eat. Then what?” Did I want to know?

“Saturday you’ll be tired again, but you’ll recover quicker, since you’ll be a wolf. We betas will still be implementing your plan. Sunday you’ll come out as a full wolf and show dominance. Nothing big, but get your scent on everything you can, claim your house, your pack, everything. I’ll also start teaching youabout your forms and how to fight. After that we’ll have three days to get you into fighting shape for the challenge.”

“It doesn’t sound like a long time,” I said. “Realistically, do you think I can do it?”

He was silent for too long, his hesitation speaking louder than words. “You have to.”

And that’s when I knew, whatever I expected the next week to be like, it was going to be a hundred times worse. I was going to have to push myself harder than I ever had if I wanted to survive.

JANE

I tooka bit of time to regain my composure. My mascara was a mess from my crying fit earlier, so, since I wasn’t going to work and I didn’t care what I looked like, I removed all my make-up.

Tyson stood behind me while I sat at my vanity. He smiled at my bare features and kissed the top of my head softly. “You’re beautiful, just as you are,” he whispered.

That was a bit much from a man I’d only met that morning, and yet it was more than my husband had ever said to me. I blushed. Tyson was a fit, handsome man in his prime. I was an aging mother with laugh lines and stretch marks. I had no clue how we were going to make this work.

“You’re only saying that because you’re fated for me,” I said, deflecting the compliment.

He actually took a moment to consider this. “Perhaps,” he said in all seriousness. “I’m not sure I can recall what you looked like before. I… don’t think I’d ever looked at you for any length of time. There was no point to it. You were human, I wasn’t. Even if you’d been the most gorgeous woman in the world, we couldn’t have been together. It may be that the fated bond has changed how I see you. Does that matter?”

Did it?

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