Page 10 of Crossed Sticks

I arrived home about nine-thirty with my buddies’ laughter still echoing in my head. Paintball had left me pleasantly achy, a reminder of enemy fire and my team’s ultimate victory. Some strategically placed paintballs were sure to leave bruises, but I’d live. That was the price of having such a good time, just like being banged up after a lacrosse game. My teammates and I were tight, and we missed each other during the long off-season. Tonight had been about catching up with them.

Now that I was home, a different kind of warmth bloomed in my chest, fueled by hazel eyes and memories that made my imagination run wild. Harper was incredible, and if I’d met someone like him before Caleb and I started fucking, my life might have turned out differently. I didn’t know Harper well enough to be sure, but he didn’t seem much like other guys who’d been part of my life.

Shit.I couldn’t believe how stupid I was. Woulda, coulda, shoulda never solved anything, and I needed to deal with reality, not indulge in useless fantasies. Harper and I would have a short-term fling, and that was all. Romance and I weren’t meant to exist in the same universe.

After changing into gym shorts and a tank top, I settled in my recliner and enjoyed the cool air from a nearby AC vent. Outside the window, the lake shimmered in the moonlight, freeing my mind to focus on Harper. As much as I’d enjoyed spending time with my teammates, I hadn’t been able to shake the memories of what happened at the Jitterbug.

Harper’s unexpected appearance was confusing. A ridiculous thought had brought me up short—was he following me? It was impossible, of course, because he wouldn’t have known where to start. Once he explained he lived nearby, his presence mademore sense. Having him in the neighborhood was a stroke of luck, because hanging out would be more convenient if we lived close to each other.

I shifted in my chair, remembering how he turned me inside-fucking-out. I could still feel his lips on mine, thrill at the roughness of his unshaven cheeks, and bask in the memory of the heat radiating between us while I held him. From the moment he sat down, I hadn’t been able to tear my eyes away. When I smelled him—citrus cologne mixed with his natural scent—I knew I had to get him alone. Inviting him home would have meant standing up my friends, but instinct told me he might go for something risky. I’d been right, and exactly as I’d suspected, his wide-eyed expression was at odds with the dirty-minded man inside. He enjoyed our bathroom shenanigans as much as I did, but something about our encounter made me wonder if he’d ever let himself go like that before.

Our makeshift fuck was the best sex I’d had in years, and I hadn’t even been inside him. There was no doubt he’d been crazy about it, since having two orgasms within ten minutes would be impressive for anyone. He’d been loud, his body thrumming with energy as he gyrated in front of me like a man starving for sex. His abandon drove me wild, and the way he flew apart in my arms, cursing and groaning, burned a permanent place in my memory. It might have been his first time doing something like that, but my money said it wouldn’t be his last.

Mental note: find out what else Harper may not know he likes to do.

But another thought made my stomach sink—Harper and I hadn’t discussed our professions yet. He was probably a lawyer or stockbroker, something solid with steady work and a good future. I hadn’t asked, because then he’d want to know what I did for a living. The prospect of telling him I played lacrosse was scary. Revealing I was a professional athlete caught a guy’sattention like nothing else. Some ran for the hills, while others wanted to use me to fulfill every fantasy they’d ever had about jocks. Then there were the ones whose eyes changed; in a flash, I went from being a hookup to a meal ticket.

I hoped Harper would be different, but I’d been wrong before. Regardless, I’d have to tell him if we kept seeing each other. One-night stands I could keep in the dark, but a friend with benefits? I’d feel dishonest not telling him, but even if I didn’t, he was bound to find out. However things ended between us, I didn’t want him thinking I lied to him.

My anxiety was building. I didn’t know how to deal with this because I wasn’t used to letting people into my life. Since the Caleb debacle years earlier, only one guy—Gabe—had piqued my interest. Not long after I arrived in Buffalo, we went out three times, but I was still too hung up on Caleb to think about anything serious. Sex with Gabe was awesome, but as soon as I realized he was catching feelings, I took off in the other direction.

When we ran into each other at a party a few months later, the former spark was gone. Though we never went out or hooked up again, we became good friends. He dated around a lot, so maybe he could give me some advice. I reached for my phone and started typing.

LUCA: Hey, what’s up? If you can spare a minute, I have a question.

I turned on the TV while I waited for a response, but his reply came before I could find something to watch.

GABE: Look who it is. Are you in Chicago?

LUCA: No. Mom and Dad went to see family in Italy, and I didn’t have time to tag along because of photo shoots. Buffalo it is. Hooray!

GABE: I’m here too. Going to NH with a friend next week for some R&R.

LUCA: LOL. I can imagine what kind of friend and R&R you’re talking about.

GABE: Imagine all you want.

LUCA: Is it that blond guy who does live broadcasts on Instagram?

GABE: I refuse to answer on the grounds…

LUCA: Aha!

GABE: He’s talented in certain ways. What can I say?

It figured. Gabe liked them young, and he’d somehow gotten involved with several social media influencers.

LUCA: I hope you enjoy your getaway. Speaking of having fun, I’ve got a question. I met a guy and don’t know what to do.

GABE: As you may remember, I know you don’t need the birds and bees talk.

LUCA: Fuck no. Never got one to start with. I figured things out on my own, and I’ve done fine ever since.

GABE: So why are you asking me what to do?

Was he really confused or just giving me hell? Either way, I had to answer.

LUCA: I’m talking about how to proceed. I want to hang out with him.

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