We fell silent for a few seconds, but it wasn’t long before Jimmy was puffing and panting with annoyance.
“What the hell it had to do with Dwyer, I have no clue,” he said, lifting his feet up and resting them on the edge of the sofa. “He should keep his fucking nose out of my business.”
“Can we please drop it?” I asked with a heavy sigh, my eyes stuck to the TV.
“I don’t get it, though,” he insisted. “Why did he feel the need to punch me? You and me are nothing to do with him.” The sweetness of the silence was momentary. “Maybe he fancies you.”
I stiffened with my finger on the remote, my breath like a lead weight in my chest as I waited…
Then relief. “Ha, as if.” Jimmy burst out laughing and reached for me. “There’s only me daft enough to want you.”
Tears pricked the back of my eyes as I was hauled against his bony shoulder because even though I knew I was attractive to other men, my husband’s words still hurt like he’d jammed a red-hot poker into my heart.
“In fact,” he added, moving his mouth to my ear. “How about we go to bed, seeing as we’ve had to leave the party early.”
As his tongue snaked along my neck, his hand pushed up my top until his fingers found my nipple and started to circle it. My disloyal body reacted to his touch, and I hated myself for it. Only an hour before, he’d been demeaning me, but I hadn’t been touched in months. Any release had come from my own hand in the shower. There’d been no tenderness or moments of passion. The only comfort and light had been my time spent with Ronnie.
Ronnie.
“Jimmy, don’t,” I said, pushing away his persistent fingers. “I’m not in the mood.”
“Aw come on, Amber. You know you want to. You know I can make you feel good.” He moved his hand, but only down my pyjama trousers and inside my thong. When he dipped his finger inside, I shuddered as he made contact with the bud of nerves that had been so neglected.
“Jimmy,” I protested with little conviction as my body ached. “No.”
“You sure?” he whispered, as he stroked through my wetness. “Doesn’t feel like you don’t want to.”
As his mouth moved to mine, I smelt it, the booze mixed with a perfume I wasn’t familiar with and instantly I shut down. Scrambling away from him, I grabbed his forearm and pulled at it.
“No, Jimmy,” I hissed. “I don’t want to. Get off me.”
He stalled and narrowed his eyes on me and, for a second, I thought he was going to ignore my plea. Instead, though, he removed his hand and slowly lifted it to his mouth, licking the two fingers that had almost been inside me.
“Doesn’t taste like a no to me,” he said. “But if you’re sure.”
“Yes.” I corrected my clothing and close to tears, I pushed up from the sofa. “I’m going to bed. I think you should sleep out here.”
If I thought he’d been a vile piece of shit down in the ballroom, he then went a step further. He undid his belt, slowly pulled down the zip of his jeans and with his eyes on me pulled out his dick and started to pump it slowly. For a few moments I was rooted to the spot, my gaze seared to his, but when he let out a groan of satisfaction it broke the spell and I rushed to the bedroom and locked myself in.
Crying, sitting on the floor, with my back against the door, I had never felt so alone.
CHAPTER9
RONNIE
Anger, hatred, and bitterness were swirling around my veins as I knocked back a shot of brandy. I hadn’t wanted it, but Elliot had insisted it would calm my nerves. I didn’t want them calming. I wanted to remember how much I actually hated that fucking prick.
“I want them off the tour,” I hissed as Elliot slapped a hand on my shoulder.
He sighed and pulled the stool out to sit next to me at the bar. “You know we can’t do that. You also know that wouldn’t be fair on the rest of the band. They’ve worked hard for it.”
“They’ll have to get another lead singer then.” I shrugged. “I don’t care.”
“No, you don’t, but they will. Can you imagine having to audition and rehearse someone new this far in? Besides, he won’t go quietly.”
I sighed, knowing that he was right. He would kick up a fuss and make life worse for Amber. The thought of that made me feel sick to my stomach. I wanted to kill him when I saw what he was doing. How the fuck could he disrespect her like that? She deserved so much more.
Was I what she deserved? I had no idea, but I knew I’d treat her better than he ever had or would.