Page 90 of Broken-Hearted

I thump onto the top porch step. “What happened to hello beloved little sister? How are you this morning?”

She snorts. “When have I ever said that?”

“Now seems like a good time to start,” I helpfully suggest. “And yes, I’m staying.”

I look out over the backyard, into the forest, as the sunlight floods the area with a warm glow. This is home now. And I think a part of me knew it the first time I set foot here.

“Because it feels like home?” Martha asks softly.

“Because I fell in love and at the same time, I realize I’ve been as bad as you at shutting the world out in case it hurts me. I think I shut out a lot of good as well as bad.”

“You always look on the bright side.”

“Not always,” I quietly admit. “I blamed myself for it.”

“For what?”

I lower my voice, not wanting to dampen the laughter and happiness spilling out from the kitchen. “What happened to our pack. I thought it was because I was an omega.”

“Clara…” She sighs. “It wasn’t because of you.”

I nod, though she can’t see me. “I followed you, you know?”

“What do you mean?”

“When you told me to stay in the forest while you went?—”

“Clara!”

“Yes, I know I shouldn’t have.” I have paid for that decision for years. In my mind, all I see are memories of blood and death, and I will never forget it.

“It wasn’t your fault,” Martha says quietly. “I don’t know why they attacked our pack. I don’t think we will ever know why unless we went and asked, but I can’t imagine that would ever be a good idea.”

“Yeah, I know.”

We’re both silent for a beat.

“You really love him, huh?” she eventually asks.

“I do.” I’m not used to sharing my life with a person the way I have with Nathan.

I’m used to doing what’s good for me, only worrying about my happiness. It was different with Martha. We’re family. I’d annoy her and it wouldn’t matter. She knew me, understood me, and loved me.

But Nathan…

I worry about hurting Nathan by snapping or saying something I don’t mean. I think about whether he’s going to wake up with a smile and if he doesn’t, what I can do to put one on his face.

He means the world to me and I don’t want to mess up and lose him.

“You’re grinning like a lovesick fool, aren’t you?” Martha sounds like she’s grinning herself.

“No, I’m not,” I lie.

“Well, I guess if you too are busy humping like?—”

“K, bye. Love you!” And I hang up on my laughing sister.

She texts me seconds later, telling me to call her about coming down to Dawley for a visit. I’m still reading her message with a big stupid smile on my face when Nathan drops beside me and scoops me into his lap.