Page 30 of Yours, Truly

What? Wait, was this really happening?Had I broken down Nate’s defences? My eyes watered, I studied his face for anyforms of hesitation.

“Are you sure?” I wanted to make sure Nate knew what he was doing, what he was saying.

“Yes, I’m sure. You're worth it Gi, it’s worth the risk.” I grinned and he pulled me in for a warm embrace. I pulled him close and felt his heartbeat pick up the pace.

“Okay, No pressure. We take it atourpace,” I said as my heart fluttered. This was the start of something new and it could either be the best thing in the world, or my biggest regret. It was what I wanted but what the hell was I going to tell Ivy?Shit! Ivy.

22

THE HEN DO

I never thought a normal relationship with Nate would happen, but it did, and a month later we were going strong. Nate was really trying to be in a relationship and I could see how much he wanted this to work. Even on Valentine's Day, he brought me a massive bouquet of red roses, a shit-ton of sushi and he confessed he’d never had a valentine before, as we spent the evening together watching rom-coms.

We started to do more coupley things, which was actually what we had been doing all along, but this time he didn’t pull away from me. I started to stay at Nate’s place more and he stayed with me too, there wasn’t a night apart.

In the meantime, I had encouraged him to reach out and meet with Ivy as she was really worried. He had met her for coffee and apologised for his disappearance act, reassuring her that he was safe and had just needed space. Ivy had called me not long after her meeting with him, crying from happiness that he was okay. It made me smile but also made me feel guilty that I already knew this and I had for weeks. I felt like ahorrible best friend, that I had to not only hide that information, but hide that I was with her brother. I just didn’t want to add any pressure on Nate while he was adjusting to this new dynamic of us being in a relationship. I didn’t want to rock the boat.

The sneaking around had returned again but this time it meant a lot more than just some cheap hook ups, we were together now and the sex was still amazing. The only thing that hadn’t happened yet was a date; arealdate. More sides to Nate surfaced over the weeks we spent together and getting to know his passion for art, history and, of course, Star Wars was something I could treasure. Stolen moments when we were alone in our bubble were something I enjoyed and wanted to selfishly keep to myself as long as I could, before the world wriggled its way into our relationship.

Ivy’s hen do was this evening and it had been a while since I saw her, the day of my date with Zak being the last time. She had hired a private VIP area at a nightclub in Soho.

I was getting ready while Nate was relaxing on my bed, his laptop on his lap and paperwork scattered on the side where I usually slept. He was still working on a Friday night, which was pretty normal. We alternated where we stayed each weekend and as much as I loved Nate’s luxury, I loved my cosy little place, and I think he secretly did too. It felt more like a real home than a show home.

I sat on the end of the bed, zipping up my white knee length boots before jumping to my feet to look in the full-size mirror. I scanned my body as I placed some silver dangle earrings in,the purple, halter neck, sequin dress glistened in the bedroom light and I couldn’t wait to get to the club and sparkle.I look fucking hot. My long apricot hair cascaded down my back, curled, exactly as I usually had it whenever Ivy and I went for a night out. I kept my make up as natural as possible as I knew I would be dancing and sweating it off. Plus, I didn’t want to take the attention away from this awesome dress.

My eyes met Nate’s in the mirror behind me, hunger in his eyes, I smiled and looked away from him, blushing a little. It never got old, the reaction I gave him, the desire he expressed. Not just when I was made up but sometimes when I was in the kitchen in the morning, reaching for a coffee cup in an oversized tatty old t-shirt. Two hands wrapped around my waist, enveloping me. My hands rested on his strong arms around me, as I leaned back against him, raising my head to make eye contact with him in the mirror.

“Fuck Gi, you look incredible,” he whispered in my ear. I watched his mouth move in the mirror as his arms tightened around me, his lips moving towards my neck, placing a sensual delicate kiss just below my ear. I closed my eyes, composing myself. That kiss meant something more and I wasn’t going to ruin my makeup.

“I’m going to be late,” I groaned, wanting him to remove this dress from me. Feeling his hands roam my body never got old. He chuckled as he pushed himself closer to me, making me feel his growing bulge as he ran his hands over my hips and squeezed them gently.

“I’m sure I can be quick” he growled, kissing the samesensitive spot on my neck again, his eyes meeting mine in the mirror as he did it.Such a tease. My hand raised to stroke his jawline, my lips parting at the small moan that escaped me. Fuck. I wanted this so bad but I knew I couldn’t be late for Ivy.

“Nate…I have to go. You’re still going to be here when I get back?” I reached for a kiss as I turned in his arms to face him. He groaned, letting his head fall against mine and I chuckled. I pecked his lips again before grabbing my bag and rushing out the door and toward the nearest underground station. It was a lot easier to get to Soho and jump back on later to get home. On the tube I kept thinking how satisfied I felt, leaving him wanting more. I knew that making him wait would mean that later was going to be incredible.

I stepped into the club and headed to the VIP room to meet Ivy and the girls. Tonight was going to be hard. I didn't want to lie to her and I knew that alcohol always meant confessions started to spill. I needed to stay in control of myself, maybe slip in a few non-alcoholicdrinks.

The club was incredible. Neon lights strobing like crazy across the room. The bass dropped, everyone dancing like no-one was watching. The VIP area was super cosy too, a little away from the dancefloor, leather couches lining the area, with a square coffee table and expensive ball lights in the centre. It wasn’t as loud over here despite there being no barrier between the lounge and dance floor, which meant that we could talk and hear each other.

We drank a lot, had a laugh and even the tequila shots kept coming. Ivy laughed as she had her Bride-to-be sash across her body and a small tiara on her head, while free champagne from the bar staff kept coming as we celebrated Ivy. She was incredibly happy; the girls were lovely too.

Ivy hugged me close and laid her head on my shoulder. “I’m so glad you are here Gi,” she smiled. “I love you.”

“Same, and I love you too, Iv.” My heart sank at the reminder that a secret loomed between us and I had been actively trying to keep my distance from her recently. I hadn’t even met up for our monthly coffee date; I’d made some excuse that things with work were keeping me busy and even lied that I was going to see my parents on the weekend she had suggested meeting.

Ivy was my best friend in the whole world and it hurt that I was lying to her now, more often than I wanted to. I was petrified that if I told her she would be so mad, that she would disown me for not only lying, but for being with her brother. Family was everything to Ivy and as selfish as it was, I couldn’t afford to lose anything right now. Not only could I lose Ivy, I could alsolose Nate. I knew Nate would do anything for his sister. He’d once joked he would even murder whoever made her unhappy. It had already crossed my mind that this could be an easy way out of the relationship for him if Ivy didn’t approve. Also, Ivy was in a happy place, she had the wedding to focus on. This was the happiest time of her life and I wasn't going to ruin that.

Stop making excuses. My anxiety battled with me, telling me how awful I was being, that this girl beside me was my ride or die, my sister, and I couldn’t even be honest with her. That was the least she deserved. I watched Ivy as she laughed with the others and sipped more of the cocktail we had brought a fishbowl of.

“Come on, let's dance!” I proposed trying to get out of my head, wanting to get lost in the music. Ivy jumped up in no time, grabbing me by the hands, Jade came with us while Mia and Chloe stayed behind, drinking and chatting. We danced, swayed to the beats, singing and shouting along to the tunes and for the first time all night, I really let go. I needed this.

I danced with Ivy and Jade for what seemed like ages before we needed more drinks to rehydrate ourselves from the sweat that was currently on our body before repeating. It had been a while since I lost myself in the beat and I continued dancing by myself even when the others just wanted to chat and drink. It gave me time to just take a breath, sway to the music in the stream of people just at the side of the dancefloor.

My dress glistened in the strobing lights, I ran my hands up my body feeling the music wash over me, my brain relaxing mythoughts but at the same time pulsing from the vibrations of the sounds blasting across the room. My phone buzzed in my hand.

I chuckled, before looking around the room to see him standing by the doorway, smiling at me. Was this becoming a habit? I would scold him for his new stalker tendencies later. He gave me a small wave and nodded towards the small corridor he was hiding in.

The thrill made my heart beat. I looked over at the girls, they were busy laughing and chatting. I took my chance and made my way down the side corridor where Nate had just been standing. He was hiding in the dark corner as I walked towards him, seeing the bathroom sign, he grabbed my wrist, pulled me into the dark shadows and met my lips with his. He was breathless, his eyes full of lust.